I am so so sorry. I do know your despair. I really do. I also had to quit my job. A few months ago I felt that there was no solution. That the medications were either not enough or just not working. The school was telling us that they couldn't educate him. His depression was horrible. I saw no solution. The future seemed like a terrible place and the present was unbearable. What changed? It could be the increased medications. His growing brain. The change in season (bipolarity is seasonally linked). But we are having a respite. I fully expect that with his growing body and seasonal changes in the fall, we may be back to where we were just a few months ago. But I'm crossing my fingers that it will at least last for longer than a few months.
Do you have a therapist for you? If you don't please do find one. And please find a way--any way--to get a break. People told me this too and I just couldn't do it. But it really does help. I'll be thinking about you. ((hugs))
