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General Parenting
Meltdown Disaster... or at least it feels like it.
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<blockquote data-quote="Andy" data-source="post: 149266" data-attributes="member: 5096"><p>When you do have to take difficult child shopping, does he sit in the cart? I had my difficult child in the cart for as long as possible - I told him to enjoy the rides while he is still small enough to sit in the cart. It also took away stress of him wanting to go one way and me wanting to go another.</p><p> </p><p>I involved him in the shopping experience as much as possible, I would talk about what I am looking for and what I plan to do with it. If there was a choice to make, I would ask for his opinion and explain what I did and didn't like about each option. For grocery shopping, the kids learn early what brand you get and they can help take the item off the shelf (I also taught my kids to look for expiration dates on the milk.). He was in charge of storing the items in the cart with himself and unloading the cart at the check out.</p><p> </p><p>Whenever you can make a game out of something, the better chance of keeping difficult child's attention. Get your creativity juices running. Make a treasure hunt out of shopping and ask him to help find the treasurers. He is five so reinforcing colors and numbers can help. I need a red apple, which one of these is red? Can you pick out two cans of corn for us?</p><p> </p><p>For car rides, do you have a tape player in the car? Can difficult child choose a tape or CD to listen to while in the vehicle? Tell jokes, play an "I spy" game?</p><p> </p><p>Like everyone else, I agree shorter outings or ones without difficult child are best. I also know how hard scheduling your life in that way also is. You are so fortunate to have a husband able and willing to participate.</p><p> </p><p>How did your case conference go?</p><p> </p><p>Yes, you ARE a GREAT mom. If you were not, it wouldn't hurt so much. </p><p> </p><p>I think I am learning that meltdowns like a bad cold just have to run their course. Try to stay as calm as possible. Let difficult child know that you know he is not feeling right during the meltdown. "I know you are angry/mad/sad/whatever. Let's just sit here or find a place to sit until we calm down." That is so extremely hard to do because their meltdowns throw us into the depths of frustration where all we can think about is "STOP" and we try everything to stop the meltdown or ignore it which often just adds to it. Kids pick up on our frustration and it scares them, "If mom can't stop this how can I?"</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Andy, post: 149266, member: 5096"] When you do have to take difficult child shopping, does he sit in the cart? I had my difficult child in the cart for as long as possible - I told him to enjoy the rides while he is still small enough to sit in the cart. It also took away stress of him wanting to go one way and me wanting to go another. I involved him in the shopping experience as much as possible, I would talk about what I am looking for and what I plan to do with it. If there was a choice to make, I would ask for his opinion and explain what I did and didn't like about each option. For grocery shopping, the kids learn early what brand you get and they can help take the item off the shelf (I also taught my kids to look for expiration dates on the milk.). He was in charge of storing the items in the cart with himself and unloading the cart at the check out. Whenever you can make a game out of something, the better chance of keeping difficult child's attention. Get your creativity juices running. Make a treasure hunt out of shopping and ask him to help find the treasurers. He is five so reinforcing colors and numbers can help. I need a red apple, which one of these is red? Can you pick out two cans of corn for us? For car rides, do you have a tape player in the car? Can difficult child choose a tape or CD to listen to while in the vehicle? Tell jokes, play an "I spy" game? Like everyone else, I agree shorter outings or ones without difficult child are best. I also know how hard scheduling your life in that way also is. You are so fortunate to have a husband able and willing to participate. How did your case conference go? Yes, you ARE a GREAT mom. If you were not, it wouldn't hurt so much. I think I am learning that meltdowns like a bad cold just have to run their course. Try to stay as calm as possible. Let difficult child know that you know he is not feeling right during the meltdown. "I know you are angry/mad/sad/whatever. Let's just sit here or find a place to sit until we calm down." That is so extremely hard to do because their meltdowns throw us into the depths of frustration where all we can think about is "STOP" and we try everything to stop the meltdown or ignore it which often just adds to it. Kids pick up on our frustration and it scares them, "If mom can't stop this how can I?" [/QUOTE]
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