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<blockquote data-quote="DazedandConfused" data-source="post: 23722" data-attributes="member: 831"><p>I know that there are alternative programs to AA, but not many (though I did hear of one years ago on Donahue) that subscribe to the philosophy that one who is/was an alcoholic that can learn to drink in moderation. I do remember it being scoffed at by experts and the audience.</p><p></p><p>I went through a six-week addiction program 20 years ago that used the AA twelve steps. Like your husband, I struggled, and in the end, simply could not accept that I was powerless. How can one be powerless, yet make choices not to cave into the addiction? That, to me, is power. Plus, for me, my whole life I felt powerless over my own destiny, and now I had professionals telling me, no, <em>make that demanding</em>, that I accept being powerless over something that had haunted me my entire life. Frankly, it only made me sink deeper into depression. It is simply not true. I do, and did, have power in that area of my life. Being an agnostic with atheistic leanings, the higher power thing didn't sit well with me, either.</p><p></p><p>I do not accept that any addiction is a disease. To me it's a way of coping with what life throws at an individual.I know that directly contradicts the AMA and, to be honest, I think they are mistaken. There are no set medical criteria that one must meet to be diagnosed with alcoholism. The truth is that, for the most part, patients diagnose themselves. And the diagnoses are BEHAVIOR based. There is no blood test done, nor is there any type of brain scan, etc, What I was told: If you think you are, you probably are. </p><p></p><p>People in AA will tell you that if you refuse to accept your powerlessness you are doomed to failure. People will also claim that AA is the only program proven to work. However, there is no evidence to this claim because of anonymity, which makes any accurate study impossible. And, the limited studies that have been done, only point to AAs poor record of success. People would be unwilling to pay for such a program with such a record.</p><p></p><p>Having written all that. I do not criticize anyone who has been able to abstain from addictive behavior, whether it be drinking, gambling, food, or drugs through meetings and the 12 steps. If it works for you, Im honestly happy you have found success with it. My own brother, who was King difficult child, has found recovery with a 12-step program. Im thrilled for him, his wife, and children. I hope he stays clean and sober. However, AA is not the only path to sobriety.</p><p></p><p>As far as the moderate drinking, thats a tricky one. I am not an alcoholic. My body tells me when enough is enough (Though, I wish it did the same thing when it comes to cookies!). I come from a family of heavy drinkers. My Dad could drink a case of beer and still pass a sobriety test! He could never drink in moderation. Lord knows he tried over the years, but he always went back to the heavy drinking which ultimately ruined his health. Do I think he had a disease? No.</p><p></p><p>I think your husband needs to be very careful with the whole moderation concept since he is so newly sober. Especially, if hes taking medication. Im not saying it cant be done, but especially to one that is just now dealing with life alcohol free, it think abstaining completely would be wise.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="DazedandConfused, post: 23722, member: 831"] I know that there are alternative programs to AA, but not many (though I did hear of one years ago on Donahue) that subscribe to the philosophy that one who is/was an alcoholic that can learn to drink in moderation. I do remember it being scoffed at by experts and the audience. I went through a six-week addiction program 20 years ago that used the AA twelve steps. Like your husband, I struggled, and in the end, simply could not accept that I was powerless. How can one be powerless, yet make choices not to cave into the addiction? That, to me, is power. Plus, for me, my whole life I felt powerless over my own destiny, and now I had professionals telling me, no, [i]make that demanding[/i], that I accept being powerless over something that had haunted me my entire life. Frankly, it only made me sink deeper into depression. It is simply not true. I do, and did, have power in that area of my life. Being an agnostic with atheistic leanings, the higher power thing didn't sit well with me, either. I do not accept that any addiction is a disease. To me it's a way of coping with what life throws at an individual.I know that directly contradicts the AMA and, to be honest, I think they are mistaken. There are no set medical criteria that one must meet to be diagnosed with alcoholism. The truth is that, for the most part, patients diagnose themselves. And the diagnoses are BEHAVIOR based. There is no blood test done, nor is there any type of brain scan, etc, What I was told: If you think you are, you probably are. People in AA will tell you that if you refuse to accept your powerlessness you are doomed to failure. People will also claim that AA is the only program proven to work. However, there is no evidence to this claim because of anonymity, which makes any accurate study impossible. And, the limited studies that have been done, only point to AAs poor record of success. People would be unwilling to pay for such a program with such a record. Having written all that. I do not criticize anyone who has been able to abstain from addictive behavior, whether it be drinking, gambling, food, or drugs through meetings and the 12 steps. If it works for you, Im honestly happy you have found success with it. My own brother, who was King difficult child, has found recovery with a 12-step program. Im thrilled for him, his wife, and children. I hope he stays clean and sober. However, AA is not the only path to sobriety. As far as the moderate drinking, thats a tricky one. I am not an alcoholic. My body tells me when enough is enough (Though, I wish it did the same thing when it comes to cookies!). I come from a family of heavy drinkers. My Dad could drink a case of beer and still pass a sobriety test! He could never drink in moderation. Lord knows he tried over the years, but he always went back to the heavy drinking which ultimately ruined his health. Do I think he had a disease? No. I think your husband needs to be very careful with the whole moderation concept since he is so newly sober. Especially, if hes taking medication. Im not saying it cant be done, but especially to one that is just now dealing with life alcohol free, it think abstaining completely would be wise. [/QUOTE]
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