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<blockquote data-quote="flutterbee" data-source="post: 207238"><p>Yeah, well all was not as it seemed in the Land of Devon.</p><p></p><p>A came over this afternoon with the excuse of returning a vase. I took one look at her and said, "Oh, Honey" and she dissolved into tears. She was here for 3 1/2 hours while Devon was working. We talked about a lot of things. A few things really caught my attention. 1) He's been texting with a girl *a lot* and hiding it from A. He got a text while they were in the car and he actually grabbed the phone and turned it over so she couldn't see who it was from. Talk about creating an atmosphere of distrust and then complaining when she's insecure about his friendship with this girl. 2) He's being over-sensitive and accusing her of being mad when she's not and then not believing her when she says she's not. He does that with me a lot, so it's not out of character. 3) He's been running hot and cold - much like he claims she has been. 4) He told her he wasn't going to change. 5) He's too tired to do anything with her, but when his friends call and need him to run them somewhere, he jumps to it.</p><p></p><p>These reminded me so much of both his dad and my dad. He's been raised around 2 strong women - my mom and myself - and he should know better.</p><p></p><p>I told her that I have hope that they work it out, but that a relationship is a two way street and if he's not going to change then she should move on. That she - and no one - deserves to be treated like that. That Devon has a lot of good qualities, but if he's not willing to compromise and to respect her then she should move on.</p><p></p><p>A has a really good head on her shoulders. Much different than the picture Devon was portraying. She was handling this breakup out of left field with much more grace, dignity and maturity than I did at the age of 30. </p><p></p><p>Devon is a good kid - new at relationships and learning. But, I'm really disappointed in the way he was portraying things. Seems he learned his lesson. He was surprised by how much it hurt him. I guess for some reason he didn't expect it. He went to her house after work and they are working things out. A told me while she was here that she's not just going to go back and act like nothing happened - that changes have to be made. She said she's seen too many people - her older sister for one - who just keep going back and nothing changes.</p><p></p><p>There is a reason I quit dating. I don't want to worry about relationships, but when you have kids I guess that's what we do. Worry. <img src="/community/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/emoticons/faint.gif" class="smilie" loading="lazy" alt=":faint:" title="faint :faint:" data-shortname=":faint:" /></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="flutterbee, post: 207238"] Yeah, well all was not as it seemed in the Land of Devon. A came over this afternoon with the excuse of returning a vase. I took one look at her and said, "Oh, Honey" and she dissolved into tears. She was here for 3 1/2 hours while Devon was working. We talked about a lot of things. A few things really caught my attention. 1) He's been texting with a girl *a lot* and hiding it from A. He got a text while they were in the car and he actually grabbed the phone and turned it over so she couldn't see who it was from. Talk about creating an atmosphere of distrust and then complaining when she's insecure about his friendship with this girl. 2) He's being over-sensitive and accusing her of being mad when she's not and then not believing her when she says she's not. He does that with me a lot, so it's not out of character. 3) He's been running hot and cold - much like he claims she has been. 4) He told her he wasn't going to change. 5) He's too tired to do anything with her, but when his friends call and need him to run them somewhere, he jumps to it. These reminded me so much of both his dad and my dad. He's been raised around 2 strong women - my mom and myself - and he should know better. I told her that I have hope that they work it out, but that a relationship is a two way street and if he's not going to change then she should move on. That she - and no one - deserves to be treated like that. That Devon has a lot of good qualities, but if he's not willing to compromise and to respect her then she should move on. A has a really good head on her shoulders. Much different than the picture Devon was portraying. She was handling this breakup out of left field with much more grace, dignity and maturity than I did at the age of 30. Devon is a good kid - new at relationships and learning. But, I'm really disappointed in the way he was portraying things. Seems he learned his lesson. He was surprised by how much it hurt him. I guess for some reason he didn't expect it. He went to her house after work and they are working things out. A told me while she was here that she's not just going to go back and act like nothing happened - that changes have to be made. She said she's seen too many people - her older sister for one - who just keep going back and nothing changes. There is a reason I quit dating. I don't want to worry about relationships, but when you have kids I guess that's what we do. Worry. :knockedout: [/QUOTE]
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