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<blockquote data-quote="1 Day At a Time" data-source="post: 638322" data-attributes="member: 3704"><p>I know that I am chiming in late here, but I'd like to pass along some support. I am also currently providing assistance for my mother who lives semi-independently; and it's not a role for the faint hearted. I continually struggle with the need to be of assistance while not interfering with her desires and life choices. It's not easy to do. Add in years-old unhealthy methods of communication and the opinions of other family members - and you have quite a complex situation. I always try to remind myself of the ultimate goals - that she live as independently and as safely as possible. Those two goals are sometimes in opposition to one another. Everyday I try to "let go" of some of my opinions and help her move forward in the best manner possible.</p><p></p><p>It's also difficult when you find you need to spend your own money to support the cause in ways you had not anticipated. I'm right there with you and I suspect many others are as well. My mother is 87 and while she receives a small pension and SS; it just isn't enough to meet all of her needs. As time goes on, that income will cover fewer and fewer of her needs. I've come to accept that reality .</p><p></p><p>I think it is important to get occasional respite from this responsibility. That may mean giving yourself a day or two off from even thinking about the problems. It's also okay to feel frustrated emotions in response to frustrating situations. Be kind to yourself and take it one step at a time. This is definitely and marathon, not a 5K run...</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="1 Day At a Time, post: 638322, member: 3704"] I know that I am chiming in late here, but I'd like to pass along some support. I am also currently providing assistance for my mother who lives semi-independently; and it's not a role for the faint hearted. I continually struggle with the need to be of assistance while not interfering with her desires and life choices. It's not easy to do. Add in years-old unhealthy methods of communication and the opinions of other family members - and you have quite a complex situation. I always try to remind myself of the ultimate goals - that she live as independently and as safely as possible. Those two goals are sometimes in opposition to one another. Everyday I try to "let go" of some of my opinions and help her move forward in the best manner possible. It's also difficult when you find you need to spend your own money to support the cause in ways you had not anticipated. I'm right there with you and I suspect many others are as well. My mother is 87 and while she receives a small pension and SS; it just isn't enough to meet all of her needs. As time goes on, that income will cover fewer and fewer of her needs. I've come to accept that reality . I think it is important to get occasional respite from this responsibility. That may mean giving yourself a day or two off from even thinking about the problems. It's also okay to feel frustrated emotions in response to frustrating situations. Be kind to yourself and take it one step at a time. This is definitely and marathon, not a 5K run... [/QUOTE]
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