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Parent Emeritus
Musing Aloud: Can a truce be called? Can you reach out to your child with-in your difficult child?
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<blockquote data-quote="DammitJanet" data-source="post: 473416" data-attributes="member: 1514"><p>Your son sounds like he has been very respectful to you and with you. If I were in your shoes I think this is what I would do but please, dont feel like you have to take my advice. </p><p></p><p>Your son is an adult, you really dont need to know what he does in private. Lets pretend instead of drugs, he was really a Chippendale dancer and that is how he is making tuition money. You dont need to know it. His business. You have a lovely son who attends college, is fine at home, gets good grades...and you dont know a thing. Perhaps you have an inkling that something is iffy but maybe you should just let sleeping dogs lie so you dont upset the apple cart. </p><p></p><p>My son does things that I dont approve of. I did a TON of things my parents didnt approve of. Im pretty sure most of us did things our parents didnt approve of. Yes, I love my son and support him even though he does things that I dont approve of. He doesnt do those things around me. I have no intention of informing anyone of anything if it doesnt have any bearing on me. Now I fully agree with you about no driving a vehicle if someone could be under the influence. Perfectly appropriate. I would have the same rules. Actually I dont let anyone drive my cars but me and Tony (my partner). As far as anyone coming in my home who "might be" under the influence, well, how do I know unless they are extremely obvious? I am not doing drug testing at my door. </p><p></p><p>However...I do have to leave this post saying that I am a child of the 70's. That might make me a bit more...umm...lenient to some issues.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="DammitJanet, post: 473416, member: 1514"] Your son sounds like he has been very respectful to you and with you. If I were in your shoes I think this is what I would do but please, dont feel like you have to take my advice. Your son is an adult, you really dont need to know what he does in private. Lets pretend instead of drugs, he was really a Chippendale dancer and that is how he is making tuition money. You dont need to know it. His business. You have a lovely son who attends college, is fine at home, gets good grades...and you dont know a thing. Perhaps you have an inkling that something is iffy but maybe you should just let sleeping dogs lie so you dont upset the apple cart. My son does things that I dont approve of. I did a TON of things my parents didnt approve of. Im pretty sure most of us did things our parents didnt approve of. Yes, I love my son and support him even though he does things that I dont approve of. He doesnt do those things around me. I have no intention of informing anyone of anything if it doesnt have any bearing on me. Now I fully agree with you about no driving a vehicle if someone could be under the influence. Perfectly appropriate. I would have the same rules. Actually I dont let anyone drive my cars but me and Tony (my partner). As far as anyone coming in my home who "might be" under the influence, well, how do I know unless they are extremely obvious? I am not doing drug testing at my door. However...I do have to leave this post saying that I am a child of the 70's. That might make me a bit more...umm...lenient to some issues. [/QUOTE]
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Musing Aloud: Can a truce be called? Can you reach out to your child with-in your difficult child?
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