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Musing Aloud: Can a truce be called? Can you reach out to your child with-in your difficult child?
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<blockquote data-quote="Nomad" data-source="post: 475129"><p>Apologize for not reading all the posts here, but I did want to reply briefly. </p><p>I do think there is a way to accept and love our children as human beings, while rejecting the part of them that is behaving as a difficult child.</p><p>When appropriate, we can certainly extend a hand, while not enabling.</p><p>This is certainly very possible when a child or young adult is actively engaged in self improvement, clearly doing their part to improve their life and being respectful and responsible while doing it. </p><p>Those who are engaging in illegal activity, are being disrespectful or who are making no efforts...should not enjoy this privlege.</p><p>I think, although sometimes it is very very hard, it's almost always a very good idea to let our difficult children know that they are loved, but at the same time to set up clear boundaries and detach from their inappropriate behaviors/attitudes and actions. This detachment is largely for OUR benefit. Especially at this forum, this is crucial. They are not children anymore and the ball is in their court (s). Tme for us to care for ourselves and </p><p>actually demonstrate to them what healthy self care is all about. This is not rejection, this is just simply healthy and appropriate living.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Nomad, post: 475129"] Apologize for not reading all the posts here, but I did want to reply briefly. I do think there is a way to accept and love our children as human beings, while rejecting the part of them that is behaving as a difficult child. When appropriate, we can certainly extend a hand, while not enabling. This is certainly very possible when a child or young adult is actively engaged in self improvement, clearly doing their part to improve their life and being respectful and responsible while doing it. Those who are engaging in illegal activity, are being disrespectful or who are making no efforts...should not enjoy this privlege. I think, although sometimes it is very very hard, it's almost always a very good idea to let our difficult children know that they are loved, but at the same time to set up clear boundaries and detach from their inappropriate behaviors/attitudes and actions. This detachment is largely for OUR benefit. Especially at this forum, this is crucial. They are not children anymore and the ball is in their court (s). Tme for us to care for ourselves and actually demonstrate to them what healthy self care is all about. This is not rejection, this is just simply healthy and appropriate living. [/QUOTE]
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Musing Aloud: Can a truce be called? Can you reach out to your child with-in your difficult child?
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