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MWM - How are you doing?
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<blockquote data-quote="Marcie Mac" data-source="post: 308674" data-attributes="member: 47"><p>MWM you have always come across as a kind gentle person who goes out of their way to help. I know its difficult, but you have got to stop particpating in the drama that comes with grown children. You are getting yourself worked up and ill over whats going to happen two months from now, the what if, spinning out these various senarios, looking at reasons of things that may or may not happen </p><p> </p><p>My suggestion is to write son an email - Our plans at this moment are we are arriving x date, staying at x place, plan to have dinner with daughter, and are leaving x date. Due to financial constraints are unable to extend our visit. We would love to spend some time with you and your family if you are able to arrange it. Love Mom End of story </p><p> </p><p>And make your hubby your front man if you can not handle the confrontation. That is what my SO's job is now as far as my eldest when she calls, and she never ever calls just to call, there is always a back story about the grandkids and usually involving finances. </p><p> </p><p>It was strange for me as I have never ever deferred to anyone in my life, let alone letting someone handle my kiddos, but its been a good thing. He has no problem whatsoever in commiserations, but can say No, sorry, we can't do whatever or we have these plans that day. For some reason there is no debate or argument if it comes from him. Once he has set the senario, he then hands the phone to me. Am sure she thinks he has "too" much control over me, but I have asked him to do this as previously, as just a phone call and I would start to stress out -she is such a drama queen I always start thinking uh oh, what now.</p><p> </p><p>Marcie</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Marcie Mac, post: 308674, member: 47"] MWM you have always come across as a kind gentle person who goes out of their way to help. I know its difficult, but you have got to stop particpating in the drama that comes with grown children. You are getting yourself worked up and ill over whats going to happen two months from now, the what if, spinning out these various senarios, looking at reasons of things that may or may not happen My suggestion is to write son an email - Our plans at this moment are we are arriving x date, staying at x place, plan to have dinner with daughter, and are leaving x date. Due to financial constraints are unable to extend our visit. We would love to spend some time with you and your family if you are able to arrange it. Love Mom End of story And make your hubby your front man if you can not handle the confrontation. That is what my SO's job is now as far as my eldest when she calls, and she never ever calls just to call, there is always a back story about the grandkids and usually involving finances. It was strange for me as I have never ever deferred to anyone in my life, let alone letting someone handle my kiddos, but its been a good thing. He has no problem whatsoever in commiserations, but can say No, sorry, we can't do whatever or we have these plans that day. For some reason there is no debate or argument if it comes from him. Once he has set the senario, he then hands the phone to me. Am sure she thinks he has "too" much control over me, but I have asked him to do this as previously, as just a phone call and I would start to stress out -she is such a drama queen I always start thinking uh oh, what now. Marcie [/QUOTE]
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