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My 14 year Old had no empathy
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<blockquote data-quote="susiestar" data-source="post: 730827" data-attributes="member: 1233"><p>Autistics don't read faces well, which makes them not understand other people's emotions. It is very hard to have empathy when you just don't have a clue what is going on or why everyone is upset with you all the time or excluding you or insisting you do things you don't understand. </p><p></p><p>Sometimes those with autism have a VERY hard time showing what they feel, or even KNOWING what they are feeling. I still have to have my 18 year old use 1 finger to tell me where he hurts if more than one place hurts. Wiz knew other people had feelings, but it was a VERY abstract concept for very many years. This isn't because he is a sociopath or psychopath, but because he couldn't make the connection to understand that everyone feels things, just not the same thing he feels at the same time he feels it. It took until late in his teens for him to truly, deeply grasp that the adults he trusts say that this is true. He is willing to operate as if this is true, though I still wonder if he truly grasps it. </p><p></p><p>My mom explains not getting the social rules as being color blind. You can end up wearing strange outfits if you don't find some coping tools. I think many autistics don't have enough coping tools and end up lashing out when they are really just frustrated. Not that I think autistic people don't need self control also, of course. But not all people with autism are gentle and happy.</p><p></p><p>SWOT, you are lucky to have a sweet and gentle son. I think some of that is due to his having autism and lots to your parenting. You could have indulged and babied him and turned him into a spoiled brat with autism. You don't take enough credit! Not all of those with autism have that personality. Autism is a neurological condition but it doesn't determine your personality. People with autism have personalities and traits that run the entire spectrum. I am glad to say that my son is sweet now, but he was violent as a child for many years. I think we saw different ends of that spectrum of traits. People with autism can be anywhere on it, not just at the nice end.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="susiestar, post: 730827, member: 1233"] Autistics don't read faces well, which makes them not understand other people's emotions. It is very hard to have empathy when you just don't have a clue what is going on or why everyone is upset with you all the time or excluding you or insisting you do things you don't understand. Sometimes those with autism have a VERY hard time showing what they feel, or even KNOWING what they are feeling. I still have to have my 18 year old use 1 finger to tell me where he hurts if more than one place hurts. Wiz knew other people had feelings, but it was a VERY abstract concept for very many years. This isn't because he is a sociopath or psychopath, but because he couldn't make the connection to understand that everyone feels things, just not the same thing he feels at the same time he feels it. It took until late in his teens for him to truly, deeply grasp that the adults he trusts say that this is true. He is willing to operate as if this is true, though I still wonder if he truly grasps it. My mom explains not getting the social rules as being color blind. You can end up wearing strange outfits if you don't find some coping tools. I think many autistics don't have enough coping tools and end up lashing out when they are really just frustrated. Not that I think autistic people don't need self control also, of course. But not all people with autism are gentle and happy. SWOT, you are lucky to have a sweet and gentle son. I think some of that is due to his having autism and lots to your parenting. You could have indulged and babied him and turned him into a spoiled brat with autism. You don't take enough credit! Not all of those with autism have that personality. Autism is a neurological condition but it doesn't determine your personality. People with autism have personalities and traits that run the entire spectrum. I am glad to say that my son is sweet now, but he was violent as a child for many years. I think we saw different ends of that spectrum of traits. People with autism can be anywhere on it, not just at the nice end. [/QUOTE]
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My 14 year Old had no empathy
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