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My Adult daughter has issues with me but won't tell me why?
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<blockquote data-quote="recoveringenabler" data-source="post: 558876" data-attributes="member: 13542"><p>Good morning Susie, thanks for clarifying some of Buddy's questions. It would help us to help you if you would put your bio at the bottom of your post as you see we all have done, that way we can recall your stats and better support you. </p><p></p><p>Perhaps it might be helpful for you to seek some counseling to better understand your own feelings and to get help to guide you to a solution that will bring some clarity and resolution for you. Or a trusted friend, a spiritual adviser, someone whom you trust to listen well and offer you understanding and options. For me, I have found that a neutral party can often see things I can't and recommend ways of dealing with issues that I never thought of. In addition, you would get support for the feelings of loss, sorrow and anger you're feeling. Any issues with our children are fraught with so many emotionally charged feelings which can be overwhelming to try to wade through. We as parents have our expectations of how we think it should be and our children have their own expectations about how they think it should be and often those expectations are light years apart.</p><p></p><p>Many of us on this board have sought counseling in one form or another to sort out the issues with our children. Without drugs, alcohol and I assume any mental health issues, you are in some ways fortunate because those issues make everything so much more difficult to deal with our kids. Of course, you must find your own way through this heartache, but I would encourage you to find a therapist so that you can find some peace about this and not let it "eat at you with your emotions all over the place." Whether or not you can resolve this issue with your daughter, you deserve to feel happiness and peace of mind, in spite of what is going on with your daughter. A trained professional can assist you in working through all your feelings. I've found that when I can do that, I have a much better chance then of communicating my feelings to the other party when the emotional charge on my part has been diminished enough that I can share how I feel in a healthy way where I am heard. </p><p></p><p>I'm sorry about your birthday, that certainly is hurtful. Something is obviously up with your daughter and it's apparent how much you love her, it seems the path through this may require you to step outside of the situation to find a solution. It's easy to get trapped in all of the emotions we can feel and roll around in those feelings not knowing how to negotiate ourselves out. Trust your heart to find your answers.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="recoveringenabler, post: 558876, member: 13542"] Good morning Susie, thanks for clarifying some of Buddy's questions. It would help us to help you if you would put your bio at the bottom of your post as you see we all have done, that way we can recall your stats and better support you. Perhaps it might be helpful for you to seek some counseling to better understand your own feelings and to get help to guide you to a solution that will bring some clarity and resolution for you. Or a trusted friend, a spiritual adviser, someone whom you trust to listen well and offer you understanding and options. For me, I have found that a neutral party can often see things I can't and recommend ways of dealing with issues that I never thought of. In addition, you would get support for the feelings of loss, sorrow and anger you're feeling. Any issues with our children are fraught with so many emotionally charged feelings which can be overwhelming to try to wade through. We as parents have our expectations of how we think it should be and our children have their own expectations about how they think it should be and often those expectations are light years apart. Many of us on this board have sought counseling in one form or another to sort out the issues with our children. Without drugs, alcohol and I assume any mental health issues, you are in some ways fortunate because those issues make everything so much more difficult to deal with our kids. Of course, you must find your own way through this heartache, but I would encourage you to find a therapist so that you can find some peace about this and not let it "eat at you with your emotions all over the place." Whether or not you can resolve this issue with your daughter, you deserve to feel happiness and peace of mind, in spite of what is going on with your daughter. A trained professional can assist you in working through all your feelings. I've found that when I can do that, I have a much better chance then of communicating my feelings to the other party when the emotional charge on my part has been diminished enough that I can share how I feel in a healthy way where I am heard. I'm sorry about your birthday, that certainly is hurtful. Something is obviously up with your daughter and it's apparent how much you love her, it seems the path through this may require you to step outside of the situation to find a solution. It's easy to get trapped in all of the emotions we can feel and roll around in those feelings not knowing how to negotiate ourselves out. Trust your heart to find your answers. [/QUOTE]
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My Adult daughter has issues with me but won't tell me why?
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