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My daughter is a loser
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<blockquote data-quote="hearts and roses" data-source="post: 223094" data-attributes="member: 2211"><p><span style="font-family: 'Century Gothic'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: darkgreen">Thanks, ladies. I just want to say I have never called her a loser...oh I wanted to for sure, but I hate the connotation that goes with being called a loser...but I won't say it out loud to her face because that would just be one more thing for her to hang onto ("My mom called me a loser"). H might, but I think even he knows to bite his tongue.</span></span></span></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Century Gothic'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: darkgreen">I have to thank you for pointing out her age again to me. I think I've just been spoiled by easy child. Not that she's perfect, but she has been relatively easy and has always had goals that she makes for herself. So, I guess I should be marveling at her advanced maturity and just rolling my eyes at difficult child's immaturity and impulsive behavior? I was very much like difficult child at her age, except for the job thing. I lived on my own and worked full time and paid all my bills...so not really a difficult child, just part of that '80's style free living lifestyle! Haha. </span></span></span></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Century Gothic'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: darkgreen">I think it's important to continue to point things out to difficult child, just like I have with easy child - I mean, less with easy child now because she's over 21 and for the most part, doing very well. But like someone said, difficult child is still 15 emotionally and still needs things pointed out to her. </span></span></span></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Century Gothic'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: darkgreen">Last night I called her to see where she was at around dinner time and she said she was going with the nice boyfriend to Walmart and I simply asked her why she was with him, why was she leading him on...she started to protest and then just didn't say anything at all. I wasn't lecturing or angry or yelling at her. I ended the conversation with: "difficult child, he's a nice guy. If you're not interested let him go. He deserves to be with someone who will appreciate him and it's not fair of you to lead him on. We're nice people, we don't do that sort of thing. Please." And she said, "Okay mom" and we hung up. As of now, I don't know how things went down, but I do know that she wasn't with him about an hour and a half later because he was on line at home. </span></span></span></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Century Gothic'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: darkgreen">I've done all I can with this - the rest is up to her. And the boyfriend. I wish he'd dump her. </span></span></span></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="hearts and roses, post: 223094, member: 2211"] [FONT=Century Gothic][SIZE=3][COLOR=darkgreen]Thanks, ladies. I just want to say I have never called her a loser...oh I wanted to for sure, but I hate the connotation that goes with being called a loser...but I won't say it out loud to her face because that would just be one more thing for her to hang onto ("My mom called me a loser"). H might, but I think even he knows to bite his tongue.[/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Century Gothic][SIZE=3][COLOR=darkgreen][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Century Gothic][SIZE=3][COLOR=darkgreen]I have to thank you for pointing out her age again to me. I think I've just been spoiled by easy child. Not that she's perfect, but she has been relatively easy and has always had goals that she makes for herself. So, I guess I should be marveling at her advanced maturity and just rolling my eyes at difficult child's immaturity and impulsive behavior? I was very much like difficult child at her age, except for the job thing. I lived on my own and worked full time and paid all my bills...so not really a difficult child, just part of that '80's style free living lifestyle! Haha. [/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Century Gothic][SIZE=3][COLOR=darkgreen][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Century Gothic][SIZE=3][COLOR=darkgreen]I think it's important to continue to point things out to difficult child, just like I have with easy child - I mean, less with easy child now because she's over 21 and for the most part, doing very well. But like someone said, difficult child is still 15 emotionally and still needs things pointed out to her. [/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Century Gothic][SIZE=3][COLOR=darkgreen][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Century Gothic][SIZE=3][COLOR=darkgreen]Last night I called her to see where she was at around dinner time and she said she was going with the nice boyfriend to Walmart and I simply asked her why she was with him, why was she leading him on...she started to protest and then just didn't say anything at all. I wasn't lecturing or angry or yelling at her. I ended the conversation with: "difficult child, he's a nice guy. If you're not interested let him go. He deserves to be with someone who will appreciate him and it's not fair of you to lead him on. We're nice people, we don't do that sort of thing. Please." And she said, "Okay mom" and we hung up. As of now, I don't know how things went down, but I do know that she wasn't with him about an hour and a half later because he was on line at home. [/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Century Gothic][SIZE=3][COLOR=darkgreen][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Century Gothic][SIZE=3][COLOR=darkgreen]I've done all I can with this - the rest is up to her. And the boyfriend. I wish he'd dump her. [/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [/QUOTE]
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