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My daughter is a loser
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<blockquote data-quote="janebrain" data-source="post: 223103" data-attributes="member: 3208"><p>Hi Jo,</p><p>just sending hugs your way. I don't think my difficult child ever had a nice boyfriend but I can sure imagine her treating him the same way your difficult child is treating hers. My theory was that difficult child would have great contempt for anyone who had the bad judgment to like her, thus her attraction to loser boyfriends. Also, the nice guys were boring--she liked the "bad boys" a lot more, they were more exciting.</p><p></p><p>I do know how you feel about her being a "loser"--I never called mine that either to her face but I sure thought of her that way. Strangely though, once I accepted that I truly thought she was a loser I was able to detach much better and kind of just accept her as she presented herself. It really helped our relationship when I just accepted that she didn't seem to value the same things I did--such as honesty, not conning people, not using people, etc. It's like I finally got it--oh, these things don't really mean that much to her. Okay, then I'll proceed on that basis and it has really worked. </p><p></p><p>Good luck!</p><p></p><p>Jane</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="janebrain, post: 223103, member: 3208"] Hi Jo, just sending hugs your way. I don't think my difficult child ever had a nice boyfriend but I can sure imagine her treating him the same way your difficult child is treating hers. My theory was that difficult child would have great contempt for anyone who had the bad judgment to like her, thus her attraction to loser boyfriends. Also, the nice guys were boring--she liked the "bad boys" a lot more, they were more exciting. I do know how you feel about her being a "loser"--I never called mine that either to her face but I sure thought of her that way. Strangely though, once I accepted that I truly thought she was a loser I was able to detach much better and kind of just accept her as she presented herself. It really helped our relationship when I just accepted that she didn't seem to value the same things I did--such as honesty, not conning people, not using people, etc. It's like I finally got it--oh, these things don't really mean that much to her. Okay, then I'll proceed on that basis and it has really worked. Good luck! Jane [/QUOTE]
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My daughter is a loser
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