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My heart is breaking
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<blockquote data-quote="LauraH" data-source="post: 751840" data-attributes="member: 22877"><p>That's what I'm praying. But he's been talking about going back to Chicago literally since the day he arrived last November. Eventually he stopped talking about it and I thought he had dropped that idea. Apparently I was wrong. Ironically when he told me today he said that he came here with the intention of staying for one year and then deciding if he wanted to stay here, go back to Chicago, or move to another location. It's only been 10 months (I guess that's close enough to a year for his purposes) and like I said he has been talking with the ex lately.</p><p></p><p>I also feel like his finances are in the toilet after all the work he's missed...which happens frequently with him, and when it does happen he makes plans to move elsewhere rather than trying to find a way to fix them and more importantly a way to keep it from happening over and over. </p><p></p><p>He did relapse shortly after his brother's death but I was under the impression that it was a one time deal and that he had doubled down on meetings, etc., to get back on track. Now I'm wondering if the relapse was more than he led me to believe.</p><p></p><p>You're right, I can't change him. That's why I'm not putting in my two cents on his latest plans. He knows how I feel and repeating it now would only make him put distance between us. If I thought I could persuade him to change his mind I would try but my son is the kind who does what he wants and listens to pretty much no one who try to tell him otherwise...even though often he states regret for not listening after the fact.</p><p></p><p>All I can do is pray he changes his mind while bracing myself for the eventuality that he will follow through with his plan.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="LauraH, post: 751840, member: 22877"] That's what I'm praying. But he's been talking about going back to Chicago literally since the day he arrived last November. Eventually he stopped talking about it and I thought he had dropped that idea. Apparently I was wrong. Ironically when he told me today he said that he came here with the intention of staying for one year and then deciding if he wanted to stay here, go back to Chicago, or move to another location. It's only been 10 months (I guess that's close enough to a year for his purposes) and like I said he has been talking with the ex lately. I also feel like his finances are in the toilet after all the work he's missed...which happens frequently with him, and when it does happen he makes plans to move elsewhere rather than trying to find a way to fix them and more importantly a way to keep it from happening over and over. He did relapse shortly after his brother's death but I was under the impression that it was a one time deal and that he had doubled down on meetings, etc., to get back on track. Now I'm wondering if the relapse was more than he led me to believe. You're right, I can't change him. That's why I'm not putting in my two cents on his latest plans. He knows how I feel and repeating it now would only make him put distance between us. If I thought I could persuade him to change his mind I would try but my son is the kind who does what he wants and listens to pretty much no one who try to tell him otherwise...even though often he states regret for not listening after the fact. All I can do is pray he changes his mind while bracing myself for the eventuality that he will follow through with his plan. [/QUOTE]
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