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<blockquote data-quote="Shari" data-source="post: 24754" data-attributes="member: 1848"><p>Welcome. Sorry you had to find us, but glad you're here. This is a wonderful commnity, even if the common thread isn't such a positive one.</p><p></p><p>Ross Green's Explosive Child, which you may have read, really helped us. At first, our only goal was to avoid confrontation with difficult child 2 at all costs (except life threatening, like running in the street, etc). It sucked, it took a few weeks, and we all hated it cause he got away with murder, but it also opened the door for us to start working on some other behaviors. He had become so conditioned to just fighting at everything that it didn't even matter what it was to start with. We had to "recondition" him, so to speak, before we could move forward. </p><p></p><p>Then, we picked one behavior and one behavior only, and worked it one at a time, with lots of rewards for success. Its slow, it still stinks, and we have a LONG way to go, but we see progress.</p><p></p><p>Do you receive any respite? You sure could use it! Since she's placed thru CPS, I'm wondering if they might provide it, you might check into that. But do try to find time for yourself (listen to me, of all people, saying that...HA!) and one on one time for your little ones. This is a huge adjustment for them, too, and kudos, mom, for thinking of them before there's a problem. In fact, establishing a relationship with a therapist now might be something to think about for them. Inevitably, they're going to have emotions to work thru that kids without troubled siblings don't have. </p><p></p><p>I'm up cause I can't sleep, so I hope I'm not just rambling. lol Good luck. Welcome aboard.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Shari, post: 24754, member: 1848"] Welcome. Sorry you had to find us, but glad you're here. This is a wonderful commnity, even if the common thread isn't such a positive one. Ross Green's Explosive Child, which you may have read, really helped us. At first, our only goal was to avoid confrontation with difficult child 2 at all costs (except life threatening, like running in the street, etc). It sucked, it took a few weeks, and we all hated it cause he got away with murder, but it also opened the door for us to start working on some other behaviors. He had become so conditioned to just fighting at everything that it didn't even matter what it was to start with. We had to "recondition" him, so to speak, before we could move forward. Then, we picked one behavior and one behavior only, and worked it one at a time, with lots of rewards for success. Its slow, it still stinks, and we have a LONG way to go, but we see progress. Do you receive any respite? You sure could use it! Since she's placed thru CPS, I'm wondering if they might provide it, you might check into that. But do try to find time for yourself (listen to me, of all people, saying that...HA!) and one on one time for your little ones. This is a huge adjustment for them, too, and kudos, mom, for thinking of them before there's a problem. In fact, establishing a relationship with a therapist now might be something to think about for them. Inevitably, they're going to have emotions to work thru that kids without troubled siblings don't have. I'm up cause I can't sleep, so I hope I'm not just rambling. lol Good luck. Welcome aboard. [/QUOTE]
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