Hi & welcome. A few things come to mind from your post.
If you would hazard a guess what developmental age do you think your difficult child is displaying?
I ask this because I adopted older twins (almost 7) & have learned the hard way that both of them lost so much in their unhealthy bio environment.
We have had to go back & basically "redo" or teach the tweedles skills they hadn't learned (for whatever reason) from day one. wm is testing emotionally/developmentally at around 3.2 years of age; kt coming in at almost 6 years of age.
So while I have 12 going on 13 y/o children, I'm parenting & teaching skills at entirely different age level. Filling in the blanks, if you will.
My tweedles are just now learning self calming skills, boundary recognition, a bit of impulse control, trusting primary caregivers, cause & effect, etc. Things most children learn in a healthy caring environment.
Just something to consider.
Again welcome.
