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My kids' stepmom says she hates them.
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<blockquote data-quote="DammitJanet" data-source="post: 567728" data-attributes="member: 1514"><p>I think there is something completely else going on here. You have told us time and again how ex doesnt see the kids and never comes through on visitation but yet he just had them two weeks in a row. Does that happen often or was that for a reason one of you needed to make a change to the normal order? I am assuming your order is every other weekend and certain holidays that are split. </p><p></p><p>Like Hound Dog has said, kids will hear what they want to hear. I am not saying she is lying but if ex and step-mom were arguing what she said could have very well have come out in a way that was not meant in the way that the kids were taking it. I have said I hate my kids all the time but it is more the behavior I am talking about and not the actual child. I have no idea how long these people have been married but she obviously married into a ready made family with kids with issues. I doubt she was ready for what she signed up for. Who really is ready for a man with a difficult ex and two problem children. Top that off with paying what probably seems to her they are paying a ton of child support, well she probably feels somewhat resentful. Especially if the kids come over and act like they want to be anywhere but there. </p><p></p><p>I think your ex should be at all the meetings with the school. I would think he would have joint medical and educational rights. He should be in all those decisions so he cant say you are keeping him out of the loop and that way if he thinks he has any wonderful ideas to try, you can try them and if they dont work, he will be the one who suggested them and find out just how hard things are. He should also be there to go with your daughter to her psychiatrist and therapy appointments or explain why not. At least he was invited. You cant force him. His choice. </p><p></p><p>This sort of takes the wind out of his sails. Your kids see that your are working with their father and it takes the fighting out of it. It makes them feel much more secure. Right now they feel like at anytime they can be yanked from place to place and that simply isnt fun or good for anyone.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="DammitJanet, post: 567728, member: 1514"] I think there is something completely else going on here. You have told us time and again how ex doesnt see the kids and never comes through on visitation but yet he just had them two weeks in a row. Does that happen often or was that for a reason one of you needed to make a change to the normal order? I am assuming your order is every other weekend and certain holidays that are split. Like Hound Dog has said, kids will hear what they want to hear. I am not saying she is lying but if ex and step-mom were arguing what she said could have very well have come out in a way that was not meant in the way that the kids were taking it. I have said I hate my kids all the time but it is more the behavior I am talking about and not the actual child. I have no idea how long these people have been married but she obviously married into a ready made family with kids with issues. I doubt she was ready for what she signed up for. Who really is ready for a man with a difficult ex and two problem children. Top that off with paying what probably seems to her they are paying a ton of child support, well she probably feels somewhat resentful. Especially if the kids come over and act like they want to be anywhere but there. I think your ex should be at all the meetings with the school. I would think he would have joint medical and educational rights. He should be in all those decisions so he cant say you are keeping him out of the loop and that way if he thinks he has any wonderful ideas to try, you can try them and if they dont work, he will be the one who suggested them and find out just how hard things are. He should also be there to go with your daughter to her psychiatrist and therapy appointments or explain why not. At least he was invited. You cant force him. His choice. This sort of takes the wind out of his sails. Your kids see that your are working with their father and it takes the fighting out of it. It makes them feel much more secure. Right now they feel like at anytime they can be yanked from place to place and that simply isnt fun or good for anyone. [/QUOTE]
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My kids' stepmom says she hates them.
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