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My mom + my daughter = KABOOM!!!
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<blockquote data-quote="klmno" data-source="post: 195704" data-attributes="member: 3699"><p>I only have the one child, Heather, but I can definitely relate to my mom finding fault with every choice I make regarding him and with having him on such a pedestal that it isn't funny. She can get mad at me for grounding him for 2 days over something that she would have switched my legs until they bled over. Then, turn around and blame me because he's "out doing things he shouldn't be doing" but get mad at me if I discipline him. There is no logic in it. </p><p></p><p> Really, I think some women (none of us here of course <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite8" alt=":D" title="Big Grin :D" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":D" /> ) really seem to only find faults with their daughters constantly and if it isn't one thing, it will be another. And in your case, it appears that this has carried over to not only criticizing how you are raising Wynter, but being critical of Heather, too. In my mother's case, she knows that she was worse about the very things she criticizes me for when she was raising me. I don't know how she justifies it to herself, but I'm convinced she has her own issues. And that's how I look at it in my mind- she has her own issues and I would love to be able to have a better relationship with her, but since she won't even acknowledge that she has any issues- or that she EVER has made mistakes without big clarifications, I keep her and our relationship at a distance. </p><p></p><p>It sounds like your mother lives closer to you (mine is out of state), but I think you have every reason to put some emotional and physical distance in there by reducing visits and calls and so forth, if you want to do that. You don't need the negativity on top of what you already have on your plate.</p><p></p><p>Edited to add: Now I'm wondering- if your mom sees times when you aren't buying in to her criticism of you, does she get more critical of Wynter?</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="klmno, post: 195704, member: 3699"] I only have the one child, Heather, but I can definitely relate to my mom finding fault with every choice I make regarding him and with having him on such a pedestal that it isn't funny. She can get mad at me for grounding him for 2 days over something that she would have switched my legs until they bled over. Then, turn around and blame me because he's "out doing things he shouldn't be doing" but get mad at me if I discipline him. There is no logic in it. Really, I think some women (none of us here of course :D ) really seem to only find faults with their daughters constantly and if it isn't one thing, it will be another. And in your case, it appears that this has carried over to not only criticizing how you are raising Wynter, but being critical of Heather, too. In my mother's case, she knows that she was worse about the very things she criticizes me for when she was raising me. I don't know how she justifies it to herself, but I'm convinced she has her own issues. And that's how I look at it in my mind- she has her own issues and I would love to be able to have a better relationship with her, but since she won't even acknowledge that she has any issues- or that she EVER has made mistakes without big clarifications, I keep her and our relationship at a distance. It sounds like your mother lives closer to you (mine is out of state), but I think you have every reason to put some emotional and physical distance in there by reducing visits and calls and so forth, if you want to do that. You don't need the negativity on top of what you already have on your plate. Edited to add: Now I'm wondering- if your mom sees times when you aren't buying in to her criticism of you, does she get more critical of Wynter? [/QUOTE]
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