Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Parent Emeritus
My only son.
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 648650" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>Hon, my experience as one who adopted overseas, from foster care, and privately once is that social workers do understand the problems we have with adopting older children who have been in our horrible foster care system, and often abused there since there is really very little oversight. They just don't tell eager-to-love prospective adoptive parents because they need to get a certain number of children in adoptive homes...and once they are there, you can kiss their interest good-bye. There is really no difference in behavior between kids from overseas who lived in an orphanage and got no love or attention a nd kids who lived in three different foster homes and got no love and attention...or worse fell in love with a foster family, then were forced to leave...for no logical reason. I've done foster care. I quit. It is not for the child at all. Also, kids from both orphanages and in foster care have a high likelihood of having been exposed to substances pre-birth, which causes brain differences or actual damage.</p><p></p><p>I feel sorry for those who adopted especially from Russia. All that money, mostly because the kids are Caucasian (I calls it like I sees it) and t hey have not done well here, many having fetal alcohol syndrome. Of course, as always, there are the wonderful exceptions to the rules. Usually, though, infant adoption is by far more bonding than adopting a child whose brain is already developed. And I have the battlescars to prove it.</p><p></p><p>The child I adopted from foster care, who actually is very sweet and loving, was his birthmother's fifth child. The grandmother had custody of the others, but said she could not take another child since the last one wasn't much older than my son. It was lucky for y son th at he was able to come here and get the help he needed as he was delayed and has high functioning Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD). He had cocaine in his system at birth, had syphilis (treated) and open hert valve surgery at a few months old (luckily very successful). He was two when we got him, but had only been in one foster home and very loved and it showed. His birthmother walked out of the hospital as soon as she gave birth to him...so much for her. She probably kept having kids. I have my own opinions on that. I think you know them.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 648650, member: 1550"] Hon, my experience as one who adopted overseas, from foster care, and privately once is that social workers do understand the problems we have with adopting older children who have been in our horrible foster care system, and often abused there since there is really very little oversight. They just don't tell eager-to-love prospective adoptive parents because they need to get a certain number of children in adoptive homes...and once they are there, you can kiss their interest good-bye. There is really no difference in behavior between kids from overseas who lived in an orphanage and got no love or attention a nd kids who lived in three different foster homes and got no love and attention...or worse fell in love with a foster family, then were forced to leave...for no logical reason. I've done foster care. I quit. It is not for the child at all. Also, kids from both orphanages and in foster care have a high likelihood of having been exposed to substances pre-birth, which causes brain differences or actual damage. I feel sorry for those who adopted especially from Russia. All that money, mostly because the kids are Caucasian (I calls it like I sees it) and t hey have not done well here, many having fetal alcohol syndrome. Of course, as always, there are the wonderful exceptions to the rules. Usually, though, infant adoption is by far more bonding than adopting a child whose brain is already developed. And I have the battlescars to prove it. The child I adopted from foster care, who actually is very sweet and loving, was his birthmother's fifth child. The grandmother had custody of the others, but said she could not take another child since the last one wasn't much older than my son. It was lucky for y son th at he was able to come here and get the help he needed as he was delayed and has high functioning Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD). He had cocaine in his system at birth, had syphilis (treated) and open hert valve surgery at a few months old (luckily very successful). He was two when we got him, but had only been in one foster home and very loved and it showed. His birthmother walked out of the hospital as soon as she gave birth to him...so much for her. She probably kept having kids. I have my own opinions on that. I think you know them. [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Parent Emeritus
My only son.
Top