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Parent Emeritus
My Son is dead to me........
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<blockquote data-quote="witzend" data-source="post: 65437" data-attributes="member: 99"><p>I'm so sorry. I have been there and done that. For all intents and purposes, M is at least not on this planet, if he is alive at all to me. Today is his 21st birthday. I'm hurt and saddened by where we are - or aren't. While there was no "church", real or imagined, involved with him, there are a series of teachers and adults who stopped medications, stopped therapy, gathered around him in support when he made stupid decisions, blinded by his teenage rebellion against me, because he had taken teenage rebellion to a level of hatred that shouldn't be held against your average parent.</p><p></p><p>Maybe some day he will come into my life again. But he will not be welcomed as my son. If he should come into my life again he will come with the burden of a stranger at best. Someone I don't know. If I am feeling charitable enough, I will view him with the suspicion I would of that of a stranger who has done horrible things in the past that were directly aimed at harming my peace and well-being.</p><p></p><p>I'm sorry for your pain today. I <em>do</em> know how conflicted you feel. If what you are wanting is to sell the truck, do it. He's made his feelings about it pretty clear. He's 20 years old, and whatever quality of person he is, he is an adult. Show him the respect he is due by taking him at his word and doing what he says he wants you to do. Even if it <em>is</em> an idiotic decision. That's what adults get to do.</p><p></p><p>I apologize if I seem bitter today. Even after years, I figure you still get to, once in a while, when it's your child's birthday and they've had nothing much more to do than amuse themselves and their friends by causing you pain.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="witzend, post: 65437, member: 99"] I'm so sorry. I have been there and done that. For all intents and purposes, M is at least not on this planet, if he is alive at all to me. Today is his 21st birthday. I'm hurt and saddened by where we are - or aren't. While there was no "church", real or imagined, involved with him, there are a series of teachers and adults who stopped medications, stopped therapy, gathered around him in support when he made stupid decisions, blinded by his teenage rebellion against me, because he had taken teenage rebellion to a level of hatred that shouldn't be held against your average parent. Maybe some day he will come into my life again. But he will not be welcomed as my son. If he should come into my life again he will come with the burden of a stranger at best. Someone I don't know. If I am feeling charitable enough, I will view him with the suspicion I would of that of a stranger who has done horrible things in the past that were directly aimed at harming my peace and well-being. I'm sorry for your pain today. I [i]do[/i] know how conflicted you feel. If what you are wanting is to sell the truck, do it. He's made his feelings about it pretty clear. He's 20 years old, and whatever quality of person he is, he is an adult. Show him the respect he is due by taking him at his word and doing what he says he wants you to do. Even if it [i]is[/i] an idiotic decision. That's what adults get to do. I apologize if I seem bitter today. Even after years, I figure you still get to, once in a while, when it's your child's birthday and they've had nothing much more to do than amuse themselves and their friends by causing you pain. [/QUOTE]
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My Son is dead to me........
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