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My son is out. Again.
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<blockquote data-quote="Copabanana" data-source="post: 704156" data-attributes="member: 18958"><p>Well, he was working with M. But M lost patience, because of my son's constant manipulations, deceits, lack of accountability. My son would blame "the necessity to work for us" for his inability to take responsibility for himself. But he was working close to full time. And sometimes he would work hard.</p><p></p><p>I do not know what M is willing to do. But I think he is so exhausted that he will resent the need to supervise my son, like some overseer.</p><p></p><p>You see, if we give my son the work, it is a set up for everybody. Because there is the power dynamic.</p><p></p><p>If we do not give my son a place to stay, and we do not support my son to work for us, he will not work and he will not have a secure place to stay.</p><p></p><p>And I am not sure if he will change. Much. I am just not sure.</p><p></p><p>To have the illusion that by denying him safety and security--I am teaching him a lesson--and it is a lesson that he is incapable of learning. That is a set up for the both of us. I love him. I do not want him to suffer unnecessarily.</p><p></p><p>But how do you know? When there is so much love and hope and vulnerability wrapped up in a relationship, how does one<em> know</em> the unknowable.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Copabanana, post: 704156, member: 18958"] Well, he was working with M. But M lost patience, because of my son's constant manipulations, deceits, lack of accountability. My son would blame "the necessity to work for us" for his inability to take responsibility for himself. But he was working close to full time. And sometimes he would work hard. I do not know what M is willing to do. But I think he is so exhausted that he will resent the need to supervise my son, like some overseer. You see, if we give my son the work, it is a set up for everybody. Because there is the power dynamic. If we do not give my son a place to stay, and we do not support my son to work for us, he will not work and he will not have a secure place to stay. And I am not sure if he will change. Much. I am just not sure. To have the illusion that by denying him safety and security--I am teaching him a lesson--and it is a lesson that he is incapable of learning. That is a set up for the both of us. I love him. I do not want him to suffer unnecessarily. But how do you know? When there is so much love and hope and vulnerability wrapped up in a relationship, how does one[I] know[/I] the unknowable. [/QUOTE]
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My son is out. Again.
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