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My son is out. Again.
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<blockquote data-quote="Lil" data-source="post: 704161" data-attributes="member: 17309"><p>Well, yes and no. He was given a deadline and he had the money to get a place. He blew that by staying involved with his deadbeat friends and in the end chose to leave town entirely. So yes, that was his choice, but he had 4 weeks to be out of our home...somehow.</p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p>I think we go back and forth on this. </p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p>I wish I could give you specifics.</p><p></p><p>You <em>do</em> have middle ground - the apartment over the garage or something (right?) and the other house. You COULD give him a place to live, pay the "rent" and utilities and he'd have a place to be safe and warm. He'd have a roof over his head and not be in the cold. Even then, you MUST have rules though! You can't let him trash the place or move in a bunch of dead-beats. And you COULD say, "I'm giving you shelter - the rest is entirely up to you. Do your laundry, buy your food, pay for anything other than heat and AC. You want internet, pay for it. You want TV, pay for it." If he chooses to smoke pot and not eat...well, so be it. You could say, "Get a part-time job by the end of February (when it's warming up) or else you'll be out again. You've got this grace period because of the weather and for no other reason. If you can't get yourself together by then, you'll have made your choice to no longer have my support."</p><p></p><p>BUT, I don't know if this would work. I have no way to know and you don't even know. It might get <em>you</em> through the winter.</p><p></p><p>Does he still have the medical marijuana card? Because that would make a difference to me, at least a little bit.</p><p></p><p>You know, you didn't FORCE him there. He CHOSE to violate what he KNEW was a rule. If he got high on a job and got fired, would his boss be choosing to make him unemployed? I know ... it doesn't help. But it's a thought to keep in mind.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Lil, post: 704161, member: 17309"] Well, yes and no. He was given a deadline and he had the money to get a place. He blew that by staying involved with his deadbeat friends and in the end chose to leave town entirely. So yes, that was his choice, but he had 4 weeks to be out of our home...somehow. I think we go back and forth on this. I wish I could give you specifics. You [I]do[/I] have middle ground - the apartment over the garage or something (right?) and the other house. You COULD give him a place to live, pay the "rent" and utilities and he'd have a place to be safe and warm. He'd have a roof over his head and not be in the cold. Even then, you MUST have rules though! You can't let him trash the place or move in a bunch of dead-beats. And you COULD say, "I'm giving you shelter - the rest is entirely up to you. Do your laundry, buy your food, pay for anything other than heat and AC. You want internet, pay for it. You want TV, pay for it." If he chooses to smoke pot and not eat...well, so be it. You could say, "Get a part-time job by the end of February (when it's warming up) or else you'll be out again. You've got this grace period because of the weather and for no other reason. If you can't get yourself together by then, you'll have made your choice to no longer have my support." BUT, I don't know if this would work. I have no way to know and you don't even know. It might get [I]you[/I] through the winter. Does he still have the medical marijuana card? Because that would make a difference to me, at least a little bit. You know, you didn't FORCE him there. He CHOSE to violate what he KNEW was a rule. If he got high on a job and got fired, would his boss be choosing to make him unemployed? I know ... it doesn't help. But it's a thought to keep in mind. [/QUOTE]
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