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<blockquote data-quote="recoveringenabler" data-source="post: 617292" data-attributes="member: 13542"><p>I think you can pack up the clothes and put them in the garage so they are out of your home. MANY of our kids here couch surf or choose homelessness as opposed to living within rules or guidelines, usually their choice. They are remarkably resourceful. There are always shelters in your area. As many here can attest to, leaving him the occasional I love you messages while you disengage from him, seems to be the consensus on how to respond in these circumstances. We don't just move on from our kids..............we learn how to detach from their choices and their chosen lifestyles...........it's a process and it isn't easy, usually we require professional support to navigate this new territory. None of us know how to do this initially, we learn to develop new responses and slowly WE change those responses and then everything begins to change. Generally speaking our kids don't change, WE do. Once we do, then they often change too. Hang tough, as our kids understand that we are not going to succumb to their manipulations, lies and threats, they stop them. It's a process. In the meantime, be very kind to yourself.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="recoveringenabler, post: 617292, member: 13542"] I think you can pack up the clothes and put them in the garage so they are out of your home. MANY of our kids here couch surf or choose homelessness as opposed to living within rules or guidelines, usually their choice. They are remarkably resourceful. There are always shelters in your area. As many here can attest to, leaving him the occasional I love you messages while you disengage from him, seems to be the consensus on how to respond in these circumstances. We don't just move on from our kids..............we learn how to detach from their choices and their chosen lifestyles...........it's a process and it isn't easy, usually we require professional support to navigate this new territory. None of us know how to do this initially, we learn to develop new responses and slowly WE change those responses and then everything begins to change. Generally speaking our kids don't change, WE do. Once we do, then they often change too. Hang tough, as our kids understand that we are not going to succumb to their manipulations, lies and threats, they stop them. It's a process. In the meantime, be very kind to yourself. [/QUOTE]
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