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Need advice on what to do next with 4 1/2 yo daughter
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<blockquote data-quote="vidaloca1011" data-source="post: 576543" data-attributes="member: 15794"><p>Thanks, everyone! She is not, as I sometimes wonder, adopted. She was born via C-section because she was breech. She was head down, ready to go at 36 weeks and then flipped over a few days later - I remember because it was painful when she did it! We tried everything but having me dive into a pool. I'm not a strong swimmer and I didn't feel comfortable doing it. I spent a lot of time inverted, burned moxibustion (sp?) at my pinky toes, went to the chiropractor for the Webster adjustment several times, had an external version where the dr. was able to turn her halfway, but as soon as she let go, daughter zipped right back to where she was and then shoved her feet into my cervix for a couple of hours. Eventually she returned to her L shape, head under my ribs, legs straight out to my side. From the moment she was born she was ****** off and has remained so. She cried for two weeks straight unless she was latched on to my breast. She's tongue tied, which made nursing agony at the beginning, but I didn't know to have her frenulum (sp?) cut when she was an infant, so I just dealt with it for 19 months. It wasn't that bad and I'm glad I did it. I am pretty sure she knew she had it good inside the uterus and had no interest in coming out. I was hopeful that cranial sacral therapy would help. It did a little, but daughter figured out how to manipulate the situation so that she could play with the finger puppets the chiro had in his office. </p><p></p><p>She is incredibly intelligent. The reason we were asked to remove her from daycare at 2 1/2 is because she didn't like it when new babies would start coming and she figured out that her care provider would have her come and sit in her lap to talk about her feelings after she misbehaved by hitting or biting another kid. Of course, the other kid was tended to first while daughter had to be separated from the group, but she knew if she waited long enough she'd get complete attention. Once she started preschool, she was in heaven and even decided to resume potty training (she trained herself at 19 months and then abruptly quit. We just followed her lead and went back to diapers until she told us she was ready). </p><p></p><p>As far as triggers, transitions are a sure bet as are any situation where she does not get what she wants. It can be unpredictable - sometimes she will go right along with what she is asked to do without complaint, but then other times something as simple as picking up something will send her into a screaming, hitting fit. </p><p></p><p>She refuses to nap at home, unless she is really sick. Afternoons are the most difficult time because she still needs a little bit of a nap. She has never been a good napper and as a baby would only nap while she nursed on me, so I gave up and learned to sleep in the rocking chair. She slept through the night at 10 weeks and, except for when she was learning to crawl and then walk or was sick, once she was asleep, she slept all night (10 -12 hours straight). She hit most of her milestones early (the ones I remembered to write down). She talked and then crawled at 7 mo, and then walked at 8 1/2 mo. Both her father and I walked at 9 mo so we were expecting that she might walk early. </p><p></p><p>We are in Northern California and have pretty good insurance. I don't know if there are any neuropsychs in our area. We're only an hour north of San Francisco, and I imagine they must have some there. The psychiatrist we just switched to specializes in children and noticed immediately how intelligent she is and how perceptive she is. She knows I'm having a bad day before I do sometimes. I think keeping a journal will be very helpful. I just have to get into the habit of doing it.</p><p></p><p>I work full-time as a teacher and my husband also works full-time. She has been in care since she was 4 mo. Truthfully, I adore her and think she is the most amazing child, but she exhausts me and I worry about the impact her crazy tantrums have on her younger brother (2 yo). She beats on him unless we stay close, but then, five minutes later, she is a super sweet sister, sharing her most beloved toys with him.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="vidaloca1011, post: 576543, member: 15794"] Thanks, everyone! She is not, as I sometimes wonder, adopted. She was born via C-section because she was breech. She was head down, ready to go at 36 weeks and then flipped over a few days later - I remember because it was painful when she did it! We tried everything but having me dive into a pool. I'm not a strong swimmer and I didn't feel comfortable doing it. I spent a lot of time inverted, burned moxibustion (sp?) at my pinky toes, went to the chiropractor for the Webster adjustment several times, had an external version where the dr. was able to turn her halfway, but as soon as she let go, daughter zipped right back to where she was and then shoved her feet into my cervix for a couple of hours. Eventually she returned to her L shape, head under my ribs, legs straight out to my side. From the moment she was born she was ****** off and has remained so. She cried for two weeks straight unless she was latched on to my breast. She's tongue tied, which made nursing agony at the beginning, but I didn't know to have her frenulum (sp?) cut when she was an infant, so I just dealt with it for 19 months. It wasn't that bad and I'm glad I did it. I am pretty sure she knew she had it good inside the uterus and had no interest in coming out. I was hopeful that cranial sacral therapy would help. It did a little, but daughter figured out how to manipulate the situation so that she could play with the finger puppets the chiro had in his office. She is incredibly intelligent. The reason we were asked to remove her from daycare at 2 1/2 is because she didn't like it when new babies would start coming and she figured out that her care provider would have her come and sit in her lap to talk about her feelings after she misbehaved by hitting or biting another kid. Of course, the other kid was tended to first while daughter had to be separated from the group, but she knew if she waited long enough she'd get complete attention. Once she started preschool, she was in heaven and even decided to resume potty training (she trained herself at 19 months and then abruptly quit. We just followed her lead and went back to diapers until she told us she was ready). As far as triggers, transitions are a sure bet as are any situation where she does not get what she wants. It can be unpredictable - sometimes she will go right along with what she is asked to do without complaint, but then other times something as simple as picking up something will send her into a screaming, hitting fit. She refuses to nap at home, unless she is really sick. Afternoons are the most difficult time because she still needs a little bit of a nap. She has never been a good napper and as a baby would only nap while she nursed on me, so I gave up and learned to sleep in the rocking chair. She slept through the night at 10 weeks and, except for when she was learning to crawl and then walk or was sick, once she was asleep, she slept all night (10 -12 hours straight). She hit most of her milestones early (the ones I remembered to write down). She talked and then crawled at 7 mo, and then walked at 8 1/2 mo. Both her father and I walked at 9 mo so we were expecting that she might walk early. We are in Northern California and have pretty good insurance. I don't know if there are any neuropsychs in our area. We're only an hour north of San Francisco, and I imagine they must have some there. The psychiatrist we just switched to specializes in children and noticed immediately how intelligent she is and how perceptive she is. She knows I'm having a bad day before I do sometimes. I think keeping a journal will be very helpful. I just have to get into the habit of doing it. I work full-time as a teacher and my husband also works full-time. She has been in care since she was 4 mo. Truthfully, I adore her and think she is the most amazing child, but she exhausts me and I worry about the impact her crazy tantrums have on her younger brother (2 yo). She beats on him unless we stay close, but then, five minutes later, she is a super sweet sister, sharing her most beloved toys with him. [/QUOTE]
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