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Need advise about vacation
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<blockquote data-quote="Sister's Keeper" data-source="post: 690001" data-attributes="member: 20051"><p>I agree, and I am sorry that your trip was ruined. I'm sad that everyone's feelings but yours were considered.</p><p></p><p>I am the same as you, WSM, I can't stand to see anyone hurt. I'm not sure whether that is a good or bad thing, but it is what it is. Unfortunately, you got put between a rock and a hard place, and your sacrificed yourself. </p><p></p><p>As to what I quoted of COPA above, that was going to be my question. How long do we continue to punish or bring up transgressions from the past? Do we hang it over their head for the rest of their lives? Personally, I think that if someone is on the right path and trying to do the right thing that we need to try to set aside those past hurts and try to come together and heal. I cannot think it would ever be productive or positive for anyone involved to remain stuck on transgressions of the past. WSM's son seems like he is trying to do the right thing. That he has accepted responsibility for his past behavior and is trying to move on with his life.</p><p></p><p>I am not saying that we should ever forget those things, and with addicts in particular we have to remain vigilant and wary to some degree, but it can't be helpful to constantly bring up or remind someone of the pain they have caused you.</p><p></p><p>Everyone is stuck on WSM's son being an adult, but adult or not he has feelings. I don't think you get to disregard someone's feelings once they hit a certain age. I really don't care how old you are or what the circumstances are, being uninvited because one member of a group doesn't want you there, particularly when it's family, hurts.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Sister's Keeper, post: 690001, member: 20051"] I agree, and I am sorry that your trip was ruined. I'm sad that everyone's feelings but yours were considered. I am the same as you, WSM, I can't stand to see anyone hurt. I'm not sure whether that is a good or bad thing, but it is what it is. Unfortunately, you got put between a rock and a hard place, and your sacrificed yourself. As to what I quoted of COPA above, that was going to be my question. How long do we continue to punish or bring up transgressions from the past? Do we hang it over their head for the rest of their lives? Personally, I think that if someone is on the right path and trying to do the right thing that we need to try to set aside those past hurts and try to come together and heal. I cannot think it would ever be productive or positive for anyone involved to remain stuck on transgressions of the past. WSM's son seems like he is trying to do the right thing. That he has accepted responsibility for his past behavior and is trying to move on with his life. I am not saying that we should ever forget those things, and with addicts in particular we have to remain vigilant and wary to some degree, but it can't be helpful to constantly bring up or remind someone of the pain they have caused you. Everyone is stuck on WSM's son being an adult, but adult or not he has feelings. I don't think you get to disregard someone's feelings once they hit a certain age. I really don't care how old you are or what the circumstances are, being uninvited because one member of a group doesn't want you there, particularly when it's family, hurts. [/QUOTE]
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