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Need advise about vacation
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<blockquote data-quote="Copabanana" data-source="post: 690442" data-attributes="member: 18958"><p>WSM. I am THRILLED you are going on the vacation. (I wish you would write me a PM to tell me where it is you are going.) WSM's children are theirs together. (ksm, I was touched by your post.)</p><p></p><p>Oh boy, WSM, did your situation touch a lot of us. I am so glad you updated us.</p><p>KSM, this touches me so much. What a wonderful son you have. What a great and kind person. Isn't this what it is all about?</p><p>This is really the elephant in the room is it not?</p><p>And WSM, you have a wonderful son, too. All of us will be with you from here on out. We will pray he stays safe.</p><p>I am absolutely beside myself here. I want to go too!!!!!</p><p>I mean, does he not get how this looks. While this is an anonymous site, we are all of us seeing how juvenile is his response.</p><p>Now, WSM, you have already left, I hope, on your glorious vacation. But I hope you read this when you come back.</p><p></p><p>Your husband has a problem. He would not feel and treat your son the way he does, if he did not. Not all men or even most men would have excluded or rejected your son. Nor would they have put you in the situation where you are punished only for wanting to be a good and loving mother to all of your children.</p><p></p><p>I am happy for you that your children spoke up for you. But if you stay here on the site we will all have to work together in finding our voices. (Me too.)</p><p></p><p>I have been preparing to go back to work soon. (I am terrified and dreading it. I have not worked for 3 and a half years, since I quit to take care of my mother, who died.)</p><p></p><p>Well, due to the nature of where I work and what I do there is a lot of oversight into the hiring process. The date to begin was June 7th. And here it was yesterday, without a confirmation letter.</p><p></p><p>I told the registry: <em>if there is no confirmation today I will withdraw my start date. I will not be available from one day to the next. I have a family. What I do impacts other people. It is not right.</em> (You see, I had to bring in the idea of my family being hurt. I did not feel strong enough or worth enough to just be me.)</p><p></p><p>Well, when do you want to make your start date? I said: <em>My start date was June 7th. I was prepared to start. I will withdraw that date, and we can renegotiate another.</em></p><p></p><p>Well, during the night I got scared and felt haunted and woke up depressed. The recruiter had not returned my phone call. I felt ashamed. Actually, I felt shunned, and I felt it was because I stood up for myself. (I wondered if I had spoken too loudly or sounded mean...all of the <em>horrible</em> qualities that I have learned to suppress in a long life as a female.)</p><p></p><p>I called one more time. The recruiter said, well,<em> this is how they roll sometimes.</em> I responded: <em>The thing is, I don't roll that way anymore.</em></p><p></p><p>I am going back to work on the 7th *<em>I will miss everybody so much.</em> But I will go back to work stronger. I know that. I just do not know why I feel so weak.</p><p></p><p>Bon voyage, WSM, where ever you are.</p><p></p><p>(I will be guessing. I believe it is somewhere where your roots are--like if you are Russian, you are going to Russia. I am Russian Jewish. I will go, too.)</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Copabanana, post: 690442, member: 18958"] WSM. I am THRILLED you are going on the vacation. (I wish you would write me a PM to tell me where it is you are going.) WSM's children are theirs together. (ksm, I was touched by your post.) Oh boy, WSM, did your situation touch a lot of us. I am so glad you updated us. KSM, this touches me so much. What a wonderful son you have. What a great and kind person. Isn't this what it is all about? This is really the elephant in the room is it not? And WSM, you have a wonderful son, too. All of us will be with you from here on out. We will pray he stays safe. I am absolutely beside myself here. I want to go too!!!!! I mean, does he not get how this looks. While this is an anonymous site, we are all of us seeing how juvenile is his response. Now, WSM, you have already left, I hope, on your glorious vacation. But I hope you read this when you come back. Your husband has a problem. He would not feel and treat your son the way he does, if he did not. Not all men or even most men would have excluded or rejected your son. Nor would they have put you in the situation where you are punished only for wanting to be a good and loving mother to all of your children. I am happy for you that your children spoke up for you. But if you stay here on the site we will all have to work together in finding our voices. (Me too.) I have been preparing to go back to work soon. (I am terrified and dreading it. I have not worked for 3 and a half years, since I quit to take care of my mother, who died.) Well, due to the nature of where I work and what I do there is a lot of oversight into the hiring process. The date to begin was June 7th. And here it was yesterday, without a confirmation letter. I told the registry: [I]if there is no confirmation today I will withdraw my start date. I will not be available from one day to the next. I have a family. What I do impacts other people. It is not right.[/I] (You see, I had to bring in the idea of my family being hurt. I did not feel strong enough or worth enough to just be me.) Well, when do you want to make your start date? I said: [I]My start date was June 7th. I was prepared to start. I will withdraw that date, and we can renegotiate another.[/I] Well, during the night I got scared and felt haunted and woke up depressed. The recruiter had not returned my phone call. I felt ashamed. Actually, I felt shunned, and I felt it was because I stood up for myself. (I wondered if I had spoken too loudly or sounded mean...all of the [I]horrible[/I] qualities that I have learned to suppress in a long life as a female.) I called one more time. The recruiter said, well,[I] this is how they roll sometimes.[/I] I responded: [I]The thing is, I don't roll that way anymore.[/I] I am going back to work on the 7th *[I]I will miss everybody so much.[/I] But I will go back to work stronger. I know that. I just do not know why I feel so weak. Bon voyage, WSM, where ever you are. (I will be guessing. I believe it is somewhere where your roots are--like if you are Russian, you are going to Russia. I am Russian Jewish. I will go, too.) [/QUOTE]
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