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Substance Abuse
Need Advise on Placement
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<blockquote data-quote="DDD" data-source="post: 470406" data-attributes="member: 35"><p>If they don't want to go, they are not going to "work the program". That's the final line. I understand your fears and your frustrations. Our teen agreed to go because I told him he had to go. Unusual, I know, but he has never wanted to doubt my motives or to be confrontational with me. BUT although he attended three residential programs he did not embrace the concept of substance abuse avoidance. Over time (it has been ten years, sigh) he switched to alcohol as his choice.</p><p></p><p>We spent alot of money that we didn't have. We did everything that we could do. He owns his addiction. He owned it at 14 and he owns it at 24. He has many problems as a result...but...we can not control his choices.</p><p></p><p>The reason I post this is because I'm sure that you feel an urgent need to get him help. Truthfully, I felt great relief when I got him in placement. It was painful having him away from home but we "knew" it was for his own good and would improve his future. He politely went with "the flow" but in his heart he did not want help. I don't want you to think that because you can't find or afford a placement that you are not a good Mom etc. The majority of us who have been there done that had high hopes that were dashed.</p><p>Sending understanding hugs of support your way. DDD</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="DDD, post: 470406, member: 35"] If they don't want to go, they are not going to "work the program". That's the final line. I understand your fears and your frustrations. Our teen agreed to go because I told him he had to go. Unusual, I know, but he has never wanted to doubt my motives or to be confrontational with me. BUT although he attended three residential programs he did not embrace the concept of substance abuse avoidance. Over time (it has been ten years, sigh) he switched to alcohol as his choice. We spent alot of money that we didn't have. We did everything that we could do. He owns his addiction. He owned it at 14 and he owns it at 24. He has many problems as a result...but...we can not control his choices. The reason I post this is because I'm sure that you feel an urgent need to get him help. Truthfully, I felt great relief when I got him in placement. It was painful having him away from home but we "knew" it was for his own good and would improve his future. He politely went with "the flow" but in his heart he did not want help. I don't want you to think that because you can't find or afford a placement that you are not a good Mom etc. The majority of us who have been there done that had high hopes that were dashed. Sending understanding hugs of support your way. DDD [/QUOTE]
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