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<blockquote data-quote="klmno" data-source="post: 266408" data-attributes="member: 3699"><p>I don't think taking track away is a good idea. I scanned the other responses but didn't read them carefully (sorry) so I hope I'm not repeeating things too much. I think in general, the concept of "low grades, no school sports" is fine for easy child's, but not our difficult child's who struggle to get to school and just maintain and who generally struggle with social skills and self-esteem issues. </p><p></p><p>I had used a scout camping trip as a reward for difficult child once but then difficult child didn't do what he was supposed to and I was unhappy because I didn't really want to take the trip away from difficult child- I thought it would do him well to go for a number of reasons. So, I discussed it with psychiatrist and he suggested giving difficult child a chance to earn the trip back, which I did so it worked out. Anyway, psychiatrist also said that we (parents) need to remember not to use the constructive things that we want our difficult child's to do or that promote their growth and wellness as a reward/consequence. It's hard to think of other things sometimes but I tried to keep a list of things after that. </p><p></p><p>It sounds like a discussion with folks at school is in order, to me. Track would stay in the picture, in my humble opinion. Maybe the get-together afterwards (for instance) would be the reward/consequence, or something unrelated to track altogether. Maybe if she has her work caught up as much as feasible, you can take her for ice cream after track or something.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="klmno, post: 266408, member: 3699"] I don't think taking track away is a good idea. I scanned the other responses but didn't read them carefully (sorry) so I hope I'm not repeeating things too much. I think in general, the concept of "low grades, no school sports" is fine for easy child's, but not our difficult child's who struggle to get to school and just maintain and who generally struggle with social skills and self-esteem issues. I had used a scout camping trip as a reward for difficult child once but then difficult child didn't do what he was supposed to and I was unhappy because I didn't really want to take the trip away from difficult child- I thought it would do him well to go for a number of reasons. So, I discussed it with psychiatrist and he suggested giving difficult child a chance to earn the trip back, which I did so it worked out. Anyway, psychiatrist also said that we (parents) need to remember not to use the constructive things that we want our difficult child's to do or that promote their growth and wellness as a reward/consequence. It's hard to think of other things sometimes but I tried to keep a list of things after that. It sounds like a discussion with folks at school is in order, to me. Track would stay in the picture, in my humble opinion. Maybe the get-together afterwards (for instance) would be the reward/consequence, or something unrelated to track altogether. Maybe if she has her work caught up as much as feasible, you can take her for ice cream after track or something. [/QUOTE]
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