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<blockquote data-quote="Sunlight" data-source="post: 381370" data-attributes="member: 97"><p>Hello Barbara:</p><p>I do not think you are numb because this still brings drama and concern to your home. I think you have hit a wall. Your son is trying to manipulate you with his anger. Perhaps in that past that has brought him the results he desires. so he is trynig once more to use that tactic. time for you to manipulate him back and show him that the old ways don't work anymore. </p><p></p><p>truthfully he needs a flat answer with no emotion and no further discussion. </p><p></p><p>"You are 35 yrs old...too old to live with your parents. One day we will not be alive, it is kinder of us to get you used to living on your own." </p><p></p><p>I do not listen to any abuse or negativity. You can say calmly.. "I am going to hang up now, I know you are unhappy with our decision so I will let you go. We love you and wish you well, please call when you are feeling better about things." </p><p></p><p>I would feel MORE ashamed if I let a 35 yr old son of mine boss me and belittle me into letting him live with me again. You should feel empowered that you said NO. too bad if he is angry. it is your job to help him grow up. you are doing him a huge favor.</p><p></p><p>yes, seeing other families be successful can pinch. then again, they have not had to deal with what you have been thru! would they have been able to survive and still be standing like you are ?? <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite2" alt=";)" title="Wink ;)" loading="lazy" data-shortname=";)" /></p><p>be proud of yourself, Barbara, you have had a heck of a kid to raise. You are being strong and making him be a grownup even when it hurts you to experience his nasty attitude. :high five:</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Sunlight, post: 381370, member: 97"] Hello Barbara: I do not think you are numb because this still brings drama and concern to your home. I think you have hit a wall. Your son is trying to manipulate you with his anger. Perhaps in that past that has brought him the results he desires. so he is trynig once more to use that tactic. time for you to manipulate him back and show him that the old ways don't work anymore. truthfully he needs a flat answer with no emotion and no further discussion. "You are 35 yrs old...too old to live with your parents. One day we will not be alive, it is kinder of us to get you used to living on your own." I do not listen to any abuse or negativity. You can say calmly.. "I am going to hang up now, I know you are unhappy with our decision so I will let you go. We love you and wish you well, please call when you are feeling better about things." I would feel MORE ashamed if I let a 35 yr old son of mine boss me and belittle me into letting him live with me again. You should feel empowered that you said NO. too bad if he is angry. it is your job to help him grow up. you are doing him a huge favor. yes, seeing other families be successful can pinch. then again, they have not had to deal with what you have been thru! would they have been able to survive and still be standing like you are ?? ;) be proud of yourself, Barbara, you have had a heck of a kid to raise. You are being strong and making him be a grownup even when it hurts you to experience his nasty attitude. :high five: [/QUOTE]
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