Hi Lil - Welcome - I see similarities in your story and mine. My difficult child is currently in rehab - he has been in and out of programs for 3 years. He is a HS Senior now and saying that he's just going to get his GED now because he can't face going back and graduating late - also claims no need for college as he doesn't want a lifestyle that requires a lot of money. What he doesn't realize is that we will not support his lack of motivation and direction in our home. If your difficult child thinks that he can "live off the land" in Colorado - let him. Personally - I would probably let him take the car only because he would not be able to work without one, but I would provide nothing else. I would also let him know that if/when his plan does not work, you will support him moving forward in a healthy way; ie a sober house or something like that. It does not sound like living in your home will be workable as he feels strongly that he doesn't need you or your rules or society's structure. He may have a few hard years, but he needs to find out on his own what "his way" looks like. I am pretty sure my difficult child is headed in a similar direction and will try something similar. I had a sister who did this at this age - she did struggle with substance abuse for years but got ahold of herself in her late twenties and lives a happy and successful life with two children. I have hope for your difficult child and mine that their moment of clarity will come and the anger/defiance will go away and allow them to reconnect with their families the way my sister did and live productive lives. I also do agree with others that your difficult child is probably using more than pot. I know you mentioned the he refused the prescribed medications, but substance users are funny like that. He may consider that drug taboo but my guess is that he is more into the "hippie" stuff like mine - psychadelics, etc. The pawning and stealing are tell-tale signs of use.
