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<blockquote data-quote="AtMyWitsEnd33" data-source="post: 480207" data-attributes="member: 13199"><p>I am overwhelmed by the support I have gotten in just two days on this site! Thank you everyone for your feedback and information -- I am eternally grateful.</p><p></p><p>Ever since my daughter was born I have always thought something was not right about her. She was a very colicky infant who was difficult to console and was not as happy as I always thought a baby should be. Toys entertained her for 3 minutes each before she wanted to move onto something new. She has never just sat and played with a toy for 15-20 min. She is always onto the next thing. So many of her behaviors point to ADHD but she has also failed an emotions recognition test. She was shown several photographs of real human faces with various expressions and had a very difficult time determining what that facial expression meant. The docs seemed to gloss over that fact and not be concerned but as a parent and human being it is something that has always haunted me. It is so hard for me to understand how you cannot look at a sad face and know that person is sad.</p><p></p><p>I have to admit I am EXHAUSTED. For her entire 9 years I have done battle with this child. I spend most of my time wishing for her to grow up fast so that maybe the problems will go away. I want to enjoy my daughter, I want to be able to look forward to spending time together rather than dreading when the next explosion is going to occur. One on one with an adult she is great. If she is getting 100% of your undivided attention she is happy as can be - but we all know that is so unhealthy and not realistic. The other thing that has always amazed me is that she is the happiest on stage - when she performs (she sings, dances and is involved with theater) she lights up like a firework. It's like that is how much attention she needs to be a happy kid - and I know that that is terribly unhealthy.</p><p></p><p>I spoke to the therapist on Tuesday when we were there for our weekly appointment and she suggested having us fill out the Conner (?) Scale for ADHD to see if medication would be the next step. I hate to put too much faith in medications, knowing they will only give us a tiny bit of relief but at this point even a tiny bit could help me keep my sanity. Someone we know who is a former nurse also suggested seeing a neuropsychologist and perhaps having an EEG. I have no doubt that this child's brain is wired differently than most kids, I am here mom and I see it every day. She doesn't think the way most kids think.</p><p>I am so tired of feeling guilty that it's my fault or that I am not doing enough as a parent. I just want to wave my magic wand and fix it all. </p><p>On the flip side, I have seen her do "normal" things (and I HATE that word normal but don't know how else to word it) and have seen her care about others and do the right thing. She has it in her, there is just something that gets in the way sometimes. She cries and cries saying she wants to make the right choices and she wants to be "good" but she doesn't know how. She knows what is expected of her but she doesn't know how to fulfill it. It breaks my heart. As she grows older I am getting more and more concerned about depression because her self esteem is really low. </p><p>I wouldn't be honest if I didn't say that seeing the psychiatrist and therapist have been helpful, especially with the anxiety piece, but now I feel like we are back in another downward spiral and I am very discouraged.</p><p>Thank you all again for your amazing support and understanding. I am beginning to feel less like I am trapped on an island by myself.</p><p></p><p>Just curious -- has anyone read the book "Your Defiant Child" by Russell Barkley? I have read it and am just wondering if anyone else has any feedback. Also, there is a book called ADHD: Putting on the Brakes that is written for children (in both a boy and girl form) - has anyone read that with your child? Any feedback?</p><p></p><p>Thank you again. <3</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="AtMyWitsEnd33, post: 480207, member: 13199"] I am overwhelmed by the support I have gotten in just two days on this site! Thank you everyone for your feedback and information -- I am eternally grateful. Ever since my daughter was born I have always thought something was not right about her. She was a very colicky infant who was difficult to console and was not as happy as I always thought a baby should be. Toys entertained her for 3 minutes each before she wanted to move onto something new. She has never just sat and played with a toy for 15-20 min. She is always onto the next thing. So many of her behaviors point to ADHD but she has also failed an emotions recognition test. She was shown several photographs of real human faces with various expressions and had a very difficult time determining what that facial expression meant. The docs seemed to gloss over that fact and not be concerned but as a parent and human being it is something that has always haunted me. It is so hard for me to understand how you cannot look at a sad face and know that person is sad. I have to admit I am EXHAUSTED. For her entire 9 years I have done battle with this child. I spend most of my time wishing for her to grow up fast so that maybe the problems will go away. I want to enjoy my daughter, I want to be able to look forward to spending time together rather than dreading when the next explosion is going to occur. One on one with an adult she is great. If she is getting 100% of your undivided attention she is happy as can be - but we all know that is so unhealthy and not realistic. The other thing that has always amazed me is that she is the happiest on stage - when she performs (she sings, dances and is involved with theater) she lights up like a firework. It's like that is how much attention she needs to be a happy kid - and I know that that is terribly unhealthy. I spoke to the therapist on Tuesday when we were there for our weekly appointment and she suggested having us fill out the Conner (?) Scale for ADHD to see if medication would be the next step. I hate to put too much faith in medications, knowing they will only give us a tiny bit of relief but at this point even a tiny bit could help me keep my sanity. Someone we know who is a former nurse also suggested seeing a neuropsychologist and perhaps having an EEG. I have no doubt that this child's brain is wired differently than most kids, I am here mom and I see it every day. She doesn't think the way most kids think. I am so tired of feeling guilty that it's my fault or that I am not doing enough as a parent. I just want to wave my magic wand and fix it all. On the flip side, I have seen her do "normal" things (and I HATE that word normal but don't know how else to word it) and have seen her care about others and do the right thing. She has it in her, there is just something that gets in the way sometimes. She cries and cries saying she wants to make the right choices and she wants to be "good" but she doesn't know how. She knows what is expected of her but she doesn't know how to fulfill it. It breaks my heart. As she grows older I am getting more and more concerned about depression because her self esteem is really low. I wouldn't be honest if I didn't say that seeing the psychiatrist and therapist have been helpful, especially with the anxiety piece, but now I feel like we are back in another downward spiral and I am very discouraged. Thank you all again for your amazing support and understanding. I am beginning to feel less like I am trapped on an island by myself. Just curious -- has anyone read the book "Your Defiant Child" by Russell Barkley? I have read it and am just wondering if anyone else has any feedback. Also, there is a book called ADHD: Putting on the Brakes that is written for children (in both a boy and girl form) - has anyone read that with your child? Any feedback? Thank you again. <3 [/QUOTE]
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