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General Parenting
New & Desperate for help with my 3y/o's atrocious behavior!!!!
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<blockquote data-quote="Hound dog" data-source="post: 482378" data-attributes="member: 84"><p>(((hugs)))</p><p></p><p>Welcome to the board Nixx. </p><p></p><p>It's not unusual to see a child's behavior suddenly take on a change for the worst when they attend school for the first time. (new environment, testing boundaries, ideas from other kids behavior, ect) But that is not usually going to be to the extreme you're seeing, not from a child who didn't give you issues before he started school. </p><p></p><p>What was his behavior like before school? Was he able to follow rules, sit for a period of time (guessing yes with his skills), did get get along well with other children? Did he get a chance to socialize much with other children outside the home?</p><p></p><p>Has anything happened that could be considered disruptive in the home environment? A move, death in the family, relationship breakup, something along those lines that a 3 yr old would have issues processing and could be acting out instead?</p><p></p><p>You're not failing your son. You just need to figure out what is going on with him. Have you attempted to calmly sit down and just ask him why he is doing the things he's doing in school, you have to be careful not to get angry at his answers though or if he doesn't know how to verbalize it yet. Sometimes just calmly asking them, like you'd ask them what they had for breakfast.....is enough to get you some answers. </p><p></p><p>Just because his behavior has gone wonky doesn't necessarily mean there is a major issue. My granddaughter Aubrey went off the deep end when her parents put her into day care at 2 1/2. The sweet angelic little girl at home became the hitter, biter, kicker, food thrower, non nap taker, ect at the daycare. Her parents were stunned and at a loss of what to do. But Aubrey up until that point had only her older cousin Darrin to socialize with. She and Darrin got along fantastic with each other. So when kids at the daycare would take a toy from her, or push her (accident or not) she'd go on the attack because up until that point there had been no lessons on how to react because it hadn't come up. Not following the rules was because up til then mommy and daddy and Nana (me) were boss.......not some stranger she'd never met. </p><p></p><p>It took Aubrey a few months to settle in and adjust. My daughter wanted to remove her but I told her to wait and see if she could manage the transition on her own. Several months later daycare had no more issues out of her that was out of character for her peer group. </p><p></p><p>In answer to why she refused to take naps......Aubrey said cuz she's not a baby and didn't take naps at home.......her answers were similar to other things and were logical when viewed through a almost 3 yr old's eyes. Not necessarily right by any means, just it made sense to her. Talking with her helped. It just took time.</p><p></p><p>If the behavior doesn't begin to wain after some more time or talking to him ect, then maybe you could have him evaled to see if it is something else. But it's strange to see a child that was basically well behaved do a complete turn around suddenly. That is usually environmental, not always, but usually. </p><p></p><p>All 3 of mine passed through the awful transition to school and back to their normal dispositions after a period of time.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Hound dog, post: 482378, member: 84"] (((hugs))) Welcome to the board Nixx. It's not unusual to see a child's behavior suddenly take on a change for the worst when they attend school for the first time. (new environment, testing boundaries, ideas from other kids behavior, ect) But that is not usually going to be to the extreme you're seeing, not from a child who didn't give you issues before he started school. What was his behavior like before school? Was he able to follow rules, sit for a period of time (guessing yes with his skills), did get get along well with other children? Did he get a chance to socialize much with other children outside the home? Has anything happened that could be considered disruptive in the home environment? A move, death in the family, relationship breakup, something along those lines that a 3 yr old would have issues processing and could be acting out instead? You're not failing your son. You just need to figure out what is going on with him. Have you attempted to calmly sit down and just ask him why he is doing the things he's doing in school, you have to be careful not to get angry at his answers though or if he doesn't know how to verbalize it yet. Sometimes just calmly asking them, like you'd ask them what they had for breakfast.....is enough to get you some answers. Just because his behavior has gone wonky doesn't necessarily mean there is a major issue. My granddaughter Aubrey went off the deep end when her parents put her into day care at 2 1/2. The sweet angelic little girl at home became the hitter, biter, kicker, food thrower, non nap taker, ect at the daycare. Her parents were stunned and at a loss of what to do. But Aubrey up until that point had only her older cousin Darrin to socialize with. She and Darrin got along fantastic with each other. So when kids at the daycare would take a toy from her, or push her (accident or not) she'd go on the attack because up until that point there had been no lessons on how to react because it hadn't come up. Not following the rules was because up til then mommy and daddy and Nana (me) were boss.......not some stranger she'd never met. It took Aubrey a few months to settle in and adjust. My daughter wanted to remove her but I told her to wait and see if she could manage the transition on her own. Several months later daycare had no more issues out of her that was out of character for her peer group. In answer to why she refused to take naps......Aubrey said cuz she's not a baby and didn't take naps at home.......her answers were similar to other things and were logical when viewed through a almost 3 yr old's eyes. Not necessarily right by any means, just it made sense to her. Talking with her helped. It just took time. If the behavior doesn't begin to wain after some more time or talking to him ect, then maybe you could have him evaled to see if it is something else. But it's strange to see a child that was basically well behaved do a complete turn around suddenly. That is usually environmental, not always, but usually. All 3 of mine passed through the awful transition to school and back to their normal dispositions after a period of time. [/QUOTE]
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New & Desperate for help with my 3y/o's atrocious behavior!!!!
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