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<blockquote data-quote="susiestar" data-source="post: 694140" data-attributes="member: 1233"><p>I am so sorry you are coping with this. Your son NEEDS residential treatment. The entire family needs him to be in residential treatment. This is truly the best thing for all of you I told several people that I would not sacrifice my other children on the altar of my oldest child's problems. It means that I would not and could not put my oldest child's needs above the needs of my other children - they were all equally important and the other children deserved a peaceful home life and some of my attention. By phrasing it the way I did, as sacrificing the other children, it helped some of the therapists we worked with to see that the needs of the entire family had to be considered as treatment plans were made, not just the needs of the difficult child. Thinking of the situation this way helped make my oldest child's long inpatient stay easier to handle.</p><p></p><p>As for support, it is pretty common for extended family to not see the need for extensive treatment. They do not live with him and are just being blind. While it may be unusual, this site is incredibly supportive and I urge you to read, post and be active. We truly 'get it', and have or are living it in our own homes. This is a situation that you have t live through before you understand it - if it can be understood - and support from the trenches can be invaluable.</p><p></p><p>I do remember telling a few non-supportive friends/relatives and even several doctors that if they thought that I was doing it all wrong then they could take him home and cope with him for a month. Oddly enough, not a single one took me up on it!</p><p></p><p>It would be a great idea to have your son thoroughly evaluated and to start a Parent Report. A children's hospital or university hospital is usually where you would find a neuropsychologist and child psychiatrists. Having in depth testing for all kinds of problems including learning disabilities, sensory integration problems, and a lot of other things is important to giving him the right kinds of help. A Parent Report is a document that you create that keeps all the info in 1 place. The link in my signature will take you to more info and directions to create the Report.</p><p></p><p>Welcome to the site and the community!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="susiestar, post: 694140, member: 1233"] I am so sorry you are coping with this. Your son NEEDS residential treatment. The entire family needs him to be in residential treatment. This is truly the best thing for all of you I told several people that I would not sacrifice my other children on the altar of my oldest child's problems. It means that I would not and could not put my oldest child's needs above the needs of my other children - they were all equally important and the other children deserved a peaceful home life and some of my attention. By phrasing it the way I did, as sacrificing the other children, it helped some of the therapists we worked with to see that the needs of the entire family had to be considered as treatment plans were made, not just the needs of the difficult child. Thinking of the situation this way helped make my oldest child's long inpatient stay easier to handle. As for support, it is pretty common for extended family to not see the need for extensive treatment. They do not live with him and are just being blind. While it may be unusual, this site is incredibly supportive and I urge you to read, post and be active. We truly 'get it', and have or are living it in our own homes. This is a situation that you have t live through before you understand it - if it can be understood - and support from the trenches can be invaluable. I do remember telling a few non-supportive friends/relatives and even several doctors that if they thought that I was doing it all wrong then they could take him home and cope with him for a month. Oddly enough, not a single one took me up on it! It would be a great idea to have your son thoroughly evaluated and to start a Parent Report. A children's hospital or university hospital is usually where you would find a neuropsychologist and child psychiatrists. Having in depth testing for all kinds of problems including learning disabilities, sensory integration problems, and a lot of other things is important to giving him the right kinds of help. A Parent Report is a document that you create that keeps all the info in 1 place. The link in my signature will take you to more info and directions to create the Report. Welcome to the site and the community! [/QUOTE]
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