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New here...any other step-parents??? This is long...
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<blockquote data-quote="LoveMyDuke" data-source="post: 310619"><p>WOW. Thanks, Shari. Your situation is very similar to mine. However...I feel almost guilty being "commended" for anything. I don't love my SS at all. I could walk away from him right this second and never, ever miss hearing that whiny voice or seeing that miserable face again. Yes, it is THAT bad. Not only do I not love this kid...I don't even like him. In fact, I grossly DISlike him. </p><p></p><p>A big part of the problem is that SS doesn't care about me, either. It has never been confirmed by any professional, but I think he has issues with women. And frankly, why wouldn't he? His own mother has abandoned him and after her, there were two other women (SO's ex-girlfriends) who were part of his life, then not part of life--but this time each of them taking one of SS's brothers with them (one with whom SS is deeply bonded and mourns the loss of this relationship, especially during rages). And then there's me, another female and also the ONLY person in this child's life who has ever enforced rules, limits, boundaries and consequences. What's to like about me, either? </p><p></p><p>I've TRIED with this kid...I really have. My sister is the most amazing mother I know and her kids are such neat, well-rounded little people. I see what she does with them and want to do the same with SS. But SO won't get involved and I truly cannot do it alone. If I tried enforcing a rule that SO didn't...SS would laugh in my face. Or more likely, just tell me "no" and walk away.</p><p></p><p>I don't know. Have to run now but I will be back reading responses and other posts!! This board is a life saver.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="LoveMyDuke, post: 310619"] WOW. Thanks, Shari. Your situation is very similar to mine. However...I feel almost guilty being "commended" for anything. I don't love my SS at all. I could walk away from him right this second and never, ever miss hearing that whiny voice or seeing that miserable face again. Yes, it is THAT bad. Not only do I not love this kid...I don't even like him. In fact, I grossly DISlike him. A big part of the problem is that SS doesn't care about me, either. It has never been confirmed by any professional, but I think he has issues with women. And frankly, why wouldn't he? His own mother has abandoned him and after her, there were two other women (SO's ex-girlfriends) who were part of his life, then not part of life--but this time each of them taking one of SS's brothers with them (one with whom SS is deeply bonded and mourns the loss of this relationship, especially during rages). And then there's me, another female and also the ONLY person in this child's life who has ever enforced rules, limits, boundaries and consequences. What's to like about me, either? I've TRIED with this kid...I really have. My sister is the most amazing mother I know and her kids are such neat, well-rounded little people. I see what she does with them and want to do the same with SS. But SO won't get involved and I truly cannot do it alone. If I tried enforcing a rule that SO didn't...SS would laugh in my face. Or more likely, just tell me "no" and walk away. I don't know. Have to run now but I will be back reading responses and other posts!! This board is a life saver. [/QUOTE]
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