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<blockquote data-quote="LittleDudesMom" data-source="post: 713960" data-attributes="member: 805"><p>Good Morning and welcome,</p><p></p><p>I agree with Ksm when she says you need to find a time to talk with him, and explain changes...</p><p></p><p>Our kids with ADHD suffer with poor executive functioning which comes into play with their ability (or inability) to organize their thoughts through transitions. I dealt with this issue(s) with my now 21 year old son who had real difficulty with transitions - especially when he was "hyper-focused" on an activity he enjoyed.</p><p></p><p>What worked for us (by worked I mean keeping the home calm and the situation from escalating) was reason during the calm times. When he was relaxed and calm we discussed actions and consequences - over and over until it became ingrained in our house rules. He was much younger than your son because these issues reared their ugly head at a much younger age!</p><p></p><p>No engaging in his defiance or arguing is also key.</p><p></p><p>You set the rules, you follow the rules. No discussion.</p><p></p><p>It's tough to hear those "You hate me" words - but these kids and young adults spit out words before they engage their minds.</p><p></p><p>I think it's also important, especially given your son's age, that be able to set some guidelines or make suggestions as you navigate this.</p><p></p><p>Nothing happens overnight, it takes time, but in the end a calmer home and better relationships can be the outcome.</p><p></p><p>Sharon</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="LittleDudesMom, post: 713960, member: 805"] Good Morning and welcome, I agree with Ksm when she says you need to find a time to talk with him, and explain changes... Our kids with ADHD suffer with poor executive functioning which comes into play with their ability (or inability) to organize their thoughts through transitions. I dealt with this issue(s) with my now 21 year old son who had real difficulty with transitions - especially when he was "hyper-focused" on an activity he enjoyed. What worked for us (by worked I mean keeping the home calm and the situation from escalating) was reason during the calm times. When he was relaxed and calm we discussed actions and consequences - over and over until it became ingrained in our house rules. He was much younger than your son because these issues reared their ugly head at a much younger age! No engaging in his defiance or arguing is also key. You set the rules, you follow the rules. No discussion. It's tough to hear those "You hate me" words - but these kids and young adults spit out words before they engage their minds. I think it's also important, especially given your son's age, that be able to set some guidelines or make suggestions as you navigate this. Nothing happens overnight, it takes time, but in the end a calmer home and better relationships can be the outcome. Sharon [/QUOTE]
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