Again, thank you for the responses. He has been with me for 2 years now. The courts finally granted a no contact order with his bio mom. We have been seeing a Psychiatrist and a therapist. My husband has finally agreed to put him back on medication(at my insistance), we tried them before, and he manipulated his father enough by crying and saying they made him "sick" until he got his way, then back to the same behavior again.His bio has been in and out of mental health facilities her entire life and is schizophrenic, and yes, drugs and alcohol while pregnant. Bipolar is the latest diagnosis, which might be the right one, because it feels like the Dr Jekyll/Mr Hyde thing going on with him most days. The only thing he seems to like is ROTC so I've tried to keep him off the psychotropic drugs so he can hopefully go into the military like he wants to, so I'm in a catch 22 there also.. The other kids have learned to avoid him, but he doesn't seem to pick on his two brother that fight back. He picks on his little brother that is weak and small and his little sister that is small. His rage is always directed at women and people that are smaller than him. Just something I've noticed. I know nothing sexual is going on because my husband didn't believe his perfect angel was doing the things I told him at first, so I had to resort to putting hidden cameras in the house to catch him...that's how bad it has gotten. He has manipulated everyone for so long, that it took someone to stand up and point out the truth to get him help, so now he is rebelling and big time..sorry for the long story 
