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<blockquote data-quote="Kathy813" data-source="post: 363645" data-attributes="member: 1967"><p>Hi Doddlin</p><p></p><p>Welcome! First of all, to add a signature, go to the top right hand corner of the screen and look for settings. Then look down the left hand side for My profile and edit signature. There you can add the details that will help us remember your particular situation.</p><p></p><p>I think that you are taking proactive steps to deal with the problems that you are having. Your oldest son has picked his path and there is nothing you can do to change it. Hopefully, age and maturity will eventually help as will living with the hard consequences of his choices. As far as your younger son, I think some time away would be good for both of you. Maybe the grass will not be greener at his dad's and at least you will have a respite from dealing with him.</p><p></p><p>Joining our website family and going to Families Anonymous were two great steps that will help you see that you are not to blame for your sons' problems. My favorite saying that I learned on this board was the 3 C's: You didn't cause it, you can't control it, and you can't cure it. </p><p></p><p>We all grieve missing the "normal" moments in our childrens' lives. I guess we just learn to live with a new normal.</p><p></p><p>Others will be by to welcome you, too.</p><p></p><p>~Kathy</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Kathy813, post: 363645, member: 1967"] Hi Doddlin Welcome! First of all, to add a signature, go to the top right hand corner of the screen and look for settings. Then look down the left hand side for My profile and edit signature. There you can add the details that will help us remember your particular situation. I think that you are taking proactive steps to deal with the problems that you are having. Your oldest son has picked his path and there is nothing you can do to change it. Hopefully, age and maturity will eventually help as will living with the hard consequences of his choices. As far as your younger son, I think some time away would be good for both of you. Maybe the grass will not be greener at his dad's and at least you will have a respite from dealing with him. Joining our website family and going to Families Anonymous were two great steps that will help you see that you are not to blame for your sons' problems. My favorite saying that I learned on this board was the 3 C's: You didn't cause it, you can't control it, and you can't cure it. We all grieve missing the "normal" moments in our childrens' lives. I guess we just learn to live with a new normal. Others will be by to welcome you, too. ~Kathy [/QUOTE]
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