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Substance Abuse
New member - Just found out 15 y/o difficult child using alcohol, marijuana and cigarettes
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<blockquote data-quote="Zardo" data-source="post: 524700" data-attributes="member: 12490"><p>Welcome to the board. I am sorry for the sadness you feel right now. About a year and a half ago, I was in your shoes with my, then, 15 year old. I know the shock of not knowing how, what or why this happenned. It sounds like you're very informed and that will help. I would only caution against feeling that it was the change of schools or choice of peers that have caused her troubles. I initially felt that too, but I know now that it was my own son's inner dilemma. His bad choices followed him when I took the step of removing him from these influences. Who, what, where when why....it's a journey to find out. At this stage, working with the counselor will help. If you think she's in bad (meaning to the point where it is deeply affecting her life...bad grades, depressed, anger, etc) you may want to see if there is a local outpatient substance abuse program near you. My son did not make progress in individual counseling. I know for us, during the time that my son worked with an individual counselor and we were just trying to get through to him, there was no reaching him and he didn't care what the adult counselor said. As he started attending programs and meeting other teens that had similar and far worse problems who had experienced very negative consequences, he started to see where his choices may lead him. I know when I have suggested this route to other parents in my area, a common thing I hear is that they cannot convince them to go. All it takes is making a deal with them to go to the intake interview. The folks that do the intakes are gifted when it comes to reaching teens and showing them that it's in their best interest to come. </p><p></p><p>Keep posting - we are all happy to share our experiences and guide you. My good news that my son was completely derailing in all areas of his life. A year and a half later, he has been to many programs and even away at Wilderness for a while and he is so much better now. He is able to function within the realm of normal. There is hope. You didn't cause it....you can't control it....you can't cure it. Be strong and we will send you strength.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Zardo, post: 524700, member: 12490"] Welcome to the board. I am sorry for the sadness you feel right now. About a year and a half ago, I was in your shoes with my, then, 15 year old. I know the shock of not knowing how, what or why this happenned. It sounds like you're very informed and that will help. I would only caution against feeling that it was the change of schools or choice of peers that have caused her troubles. I initially felt that too, but I know now that it was my own son's inner dilemma. His bad choices followed him when I took the step of removing him from these influences. Who, what, where when why....it's a journey to find out. At this stage, working with the counselor will help. If you think she's in bad (meaning to the point where it is deeply affecting her life...bad grades, depressed, anger, etc) you may want to see if there is a local outpatient substance abuse program near you. My son did not make progress in individual counseling. I know for us, during the time that my son worked with an individual counselor and we were just trying to get through to him, there was no reaching him and he didn't care what the adult counselor said. As he started attending programs and meeting other teens that had similar and far worse problems who had experienced very negative consequences, he started to see where his choices may lead him. I know when I have suggested this route to other parents in my area, a common thing I hear is that they cannot convince them to go. All it takes is making a deal with them to go to the intake interview. The folks that do the intakes are gifted when it comes to reaching teens and showing them that it's in their best interest to come. Keep posting - we are all happy to share our experiences and guide you. My good news that my son was completely derailing in all areas of his life. A year and a half later, he has been to many programs and even away at Wilderness for a while and he is so much better now. He is able to function within the realm of normal. There is hope. You didn't cause it....you can't control it....you can't cure it. Be strong and we will send you strength. [/QUOTE]
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New member - Just found out 15 y/o difficult child using alcohol, marijuana and cigarettes
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