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<blockquote data-quote="DDD" data-source="post: 260791" data-attributes="member: 35"><p>Welcome. From the perspective of a too too experienced parent <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite2" alt=";)" title="Wink ;)" loading="lazy" data-shortname=";)" /> I'll offer a couple of "observations", lol, even though I obviously haven't observed. I am not offering solutions just some thoughts that might or might not be of help. Here are some random thoughts:</p><p></p><p>1. With my first child my expectations were that she would be "nearly" perfect because my husband and I would do everything possible to be the perfect parents. Like your daughter she was "almost" perfect. We worried at any sign of defect thinking perhaps we had done something wrong. By our third child we <strong>learned </strong>about difficult child behavior. difficult child behavior disrupts life on a very regular basis. Often it interferes with sleep. It is not usually something you analyze to recognize. It is. Sometimes it is only shown at home (or in some cases in reverse) but it impacts in an obvious, disruptive way. There is the destruction of property, sneaky defiance and behaviors that sap the joy from the environment.</p><p>2. With my first child, like you, I had to stop talking. <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite2" alt=";)" title="Wink ;)" loading="lazy" data-shortname=";)" /> She was so very bright that I was explaining myself to a little kid and reasoning with her. She was extremely bright. She would try to outreason me and that would really chap me off. LOL She would act like a little defiant hellion at home and then go off with Grandma and be the most police, lovely (and best dressed thanks to Grandma <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite8" alt=":D" title="Big Grin :D" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":D" />) little girl in the universe. I had to stop talking and make sure that I only enforced the important rules. It was too easy for me to expect her to do what I wanted done right away. Sigh. My 3rd child (now GFGmom) literally could not follow the rules regularly no matter how hard she might try. easy child's and difficult child's are different.</p><p>3. I have raised eight children with varying success. The "gifted" or extra</p><p>bright kids were far more difficult than the couple who were average or a tad below. Gifted kids very very often are difficult because they are just too bright for their own good.</p><p></p><p>I hope you don't mind my longwinded response and the hint that she may in fact just need a little different parenting. It is not easy finding your way as a parent and believe me I made some really poor choices. What I think from your post, however, is that you and your husband have been given a little girl that is a challenge but probably not a difficult child. There are books about the different needs for parenting gifted children that might be of interest.</p><p></p><p>At adult sales seminars over the years they have a key word. KISS. It is the key to successful sales. "Keep It Simple Stupid" <img src="/community/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/redface.png" class="smilie" loading="lazy" alt=":redface:" title="redface :redface:" data-shortname=":redface:" /> Once I realized that I talked too much trying to overcome objections from potential buyers, my sales flew up the scale. My parenting philosophy is similar. You are a terrific Mom, I'm sure...parenting may be easier by keeping it simple. Hugs. DDD</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="DDD, post: 260791, member: 35"] Welcome. From the perspective of a too too experienced parent :winking: I'll offer a couple of "observations", lol, even though I obviously haven't observed. I am not offering solutions just some thoughts that might or might not be of help. Here are some random thoughts: 1. With my first child my expectations were that she would be "nearly" perfect because my husband and I would do everything possible to be the perfect parents. Like your daughter she was "almost" perfect. We worried at any sign of defect thinking perhaps we had done something wrong. By our third child we [B]learned [/B]about difficult child behavior. difficult child behavior disrupts life on a very regular basis. Often it interferes with sleep. It is not usually something you analyze to recognize. It is. Sometimes it is only shown at home (or in some cases in reverse) but it impacts in an obvious, disruptive way. There is the destruction of property, sneaky defiance and behaviors that sap the joy from the environment. 2. With my first child, like you, I had to stop talking. :winking: She was so very bright that I was explaining myself to a little kid and reasoning with her. She was extremely bright. She would try to outreason me and that would really chap me off. LOL She would act like a little defiant hellion at home and then go off with Grandma and be the most police, lovely (and best dressed thanks to Grandma :happy:) little girl in the universe. I had to stop talking and make sure that I only enforced the important rules. It was too easy for me to expect her to do what I wanted done right away. Sigh. My 3rd child (now GFGmom) literally could not follow the rules regularly no matter how hard she might try. easy child's and difficult child's are different. 3. I have raised eight children with varying success. The "gifted" or extra bright kids were far more difficult than the couple who were average or a tad below. Gifted kids very very often are difficult because they are just too bright for their own good. I hope you don't mind my longwinded response and the hint that she may in fact just need a little different parenting. It is not easy finding your way as a parent and believe me I made some really poor choices. What I think from your post, however, is that you and your husband have been given a little girl that is a challenge but probably not a difficult child. There are books about the different needs for parenting gifted children that might be of interest. At adult sales seminars over the years they have a key word. KISS. It is the key to successful sales. "Keep It Simple Stupid" :blushing: Once I realized that I talked too much trying to overcome objections from potential buyers, my sales flew up the scale. My parenting philosophy is similar. You are a terrific Mom, I'm sure...parenting may be easier by keeping it simple. Hugs. DDD [/QUOTE]
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