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<blockquote data-quote="Calamity Jane" data-source="post: 552805" data-attributes="member: 13882"><p>Hi Twin and welcome,</p><p>Like Nancy, I too can understand your frustration. If his grades and motivation have been good all along, and you don't see a major drop in either, then maybe he's just doing it once in a while. Believe me, I don't condone it either; it's illegal and just plain stupid in my opinion - certainly not worth whatever high he feels. I can't comment on the twitter post, I don't know what he wrote, but of course you're upset. When he said he didn't want you or your husband to think he was a bad person, I'm sure he meant that - at least he didn't speak disrespectfully or curse you off, as some kids would. I'm sure he doesn't want to ruin his relationship with you both, either. And your suggestion of counseling, which was well meaning, probably insulted him. But you're his mom and of course you're concerned. He probably thinks you're overreacting, and the fact that you're 2 hrs. away doesn't help, because you can't see him or observe him face to face. Did he have any social/learning/substance issues growing up? Any trauma?</p><p></p><p>If he blows through all his money early in the semester, I'd worry. Until then, maybe you can take a visit on a long weekend in the next few weeks and just meet him and talk calmly. He is an adult (21), and unfortunately you can only offer your guidance, love and support. You can warn him not to break the law, etc., etc., but if he does, you can remove his phone and car if necessary.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Calamity Jane, post: 552805, member: 13882"] Hi Twin and welcome, Like Nancy, I too can understand your frustration. If his grades and motivation have been good all along, and you don't see a major drop in either, then maybe he's just doing it once in a while. Believe me, I don't condone it either; it's illegal and just plain stupid in my opinion - certainly not worth whatever high he feels. I can't comment on the twitter post, I don't know what he wrote, but of course you're upset. When he said he didn't want you or your husband to think he was a bad person, I'm sure he meant that - at least he didn't speak disrespectfully or curse you off, as some kids would. I'm sure he doesn't want to ruin his relationship with you both, either. And your suggestion of counseling, which was well meaning, probably insulted him. But you're his mom and of course you're concerned. He probably thinks you're overreacting, and the fact that you're 2 hrs. away doesn't help, because you can't see him or observe him face to face. Did he have any social/learning/substance issues growing up? Any trauma? If he blows through all his money early in the semester, I'd worry. Until then, maybe you can take a visit on a long weekend in the next few weeks and just meet him and talk calmly. He is an adult (21), and unfortunately you can only offer your guidance, love and support. You can warn him not to break the law, etc., etc., but if he does, you can remove his phone and car if necessary. [/QUOTE]
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