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Newbie asking advice on how to deal with gambler son
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<blockquote data-quote="SuZir" data-source="post: 530511" data-attributes="member: 14557"><p>How does this be any different if he would be treated with this special type of medication (to my understanding there are some studies that suggest that stimulants can make addiction in people with ADHD little bit less likely and other studies that suggest that in fact there are more addictions with stimulant treated ADHD people)? Regardless if he has ADHD or not, or any other background condition or not, he certainly has a vulnerability to addictions. To have that you don't need to have any background conditions at all. It is very common also with people who do not have any neurological or psychological condition. </p><p></p><p>How much more likely my son is to relapse or develop new addiction if he has no motivation not to? You do know, that it is very, very common for people on stimulants to have addictions also? Some even abuse their own drugs. (Yes, I know several families, whose ADHD children are having this problem.) You do understand that my son's addiction is currently treated by professionals by their best knowledge?</p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p>That is always a possibility. It is possible his athletic career ends quickly because of physical injury. Or that his development isn't good enough. After that he would most likely go to university (his grades are excellent and his plan B has been medication school, he has always thought it would be cool to be a pathologist.) If the reason would be an injury, money he would get from his athletic insurance because of that would be a great help while studying. But of course it may be, that he falls on his head tomorrow and gets serious brain injury and can't do that. Should he stop going to school also, because it may not work out? Or he could end up to accident and die. Would it be better to simply jump from the bridge right now? </p><p></p><p>Yes, of course you need plans B, C and D when you are chasing your risky dreams, but it is not a reason to not chase them at all. Life is fragile and anything can happen, but it is lousy way to live your life by just averting risks and just letting go of your dreams because they may not end up working out.</p><p></p><p> </p><p></p><p>You do understand that he is already living that dream? Yes, he has even bigger dreams, but even this is already it. </p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p>I would be much more worried about addictions with him, if he wouldn't have this dream and these goals. Yes, I'm worried about his sport damaging his health, but it has much more to do with his joints than his possible neurological problems. And he is the one who will live with those choices. I can't make those decisions for him. How would you feel, if your mother would forbid you from going back to University, because stress can damage your health and she would say you should just find a job from McDonald's or something? Would that make any sense to you?</p><p></p><p>The thing that seems to escape from you is, that my son is an adult. While for example I would find it a positive thing for him to have his third through neuropsychologist evaluation (it really is possible that situation has changed from the time he had his last one five years ago) I do understand that it may not be sonething he wants to pursue at this time.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="SuZir, post: 530511, member: 14557"] How does this be any different if he would be treated with this special type of medication (to my understanding there are some studies that suggest that stimulants can make addiction in people with ADHD little bit less likely and other studies that suggest that in fact there are more addictions with stimulant treated ADHD people)? Regardless if he has ADHD or not, or any other background condition or not, he certainly has a vulnerability to addictions. To have that you don't need to have any background conditions at all. It is very common also with people who do not have any neurological or psychological condition. How much more likely my son is to relapse or develop new addiction if he has no motivation not to? You do know, that it is very, very common for people on stimulants to have addictions also? Some even abuse their own drugs. (Yes, I know several families, whose ADHD children are having this problem.) You do understand that my son's addiction is currently treated by professionals by their best knowledge? That is always a possibility. It is possible his athletic career ends quickly because of physical injury. Or that his development isn't good enough. After that he would most likely go to university (his grades are excellent and his plan B has been medication school, he has always thought it would be cool to be a pathologist.) If the reason would be an injury, money he would get from his athletic insurance because of that would be a great help while studying. But of course it may be, that he falls on his head tomorrow and gets serious brain injury and can't do that. Should he stop going to school also, because it may not work out? Or he could end up to accident and die. Would it be better to simply jump from the bridge right now? Yes, of course you need plans B, C and D when you are chasing your risky dreams, but it is not a reason to not chase them at all. Life is fragile and anything can happen, but it is lousy way to live your life by just averting risks and just letting go of your dreams because they may not end up working out. You do understand that he is already living that dream? Yes, he has even bigger dreams, but even this is already it. I would be much more worried about addictions with him, if he wouldn't have this dream and these goals. Yes, I'm worried about his sport damaging his health, but it has much more to do with his joints than his possible neurological problems. And he is the one who will live with those choices. I can't make those decisions for him. How would you feel, if your mother would forbid you from going back to University, because stress can damage your health and she would say you should just find a job from McDonald's or something? Would that make any sense to you? The thing that seems to escape from you is, that my son is an adult. While for example I would find it a positive thing for him to have his third through neuropsychologist evaluation (it really is possible that situation has changed from the time he had his last one five years ago) I do understand that it may not be sonething he wants to pursue at this time. [/QUOTE]
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