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Newbie...Can I get some advice please? Dont know what to do!!
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 571641" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>Hi there and welcome to the board <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite1" alt=":)" title="Smile :)" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":)" /></p><p></p><p>My very first recommendation is to take them for a different and more thorough evaluation. Pediatricians tend to be very poor diagnosticians about childhood disorders. Filling out one short test, even with teachers involved, doesn't tell you much. Many of us oldsters feel ODD is a useless diagnosis and most of the time it is not used by higher level professionals such as neuropsychs and psychiatrists. It really doesn't mean more than the child is defiant. It does not tell you why. ODD rarely stands alone. There is usually a larger, bigger issue causing the ODD. I'm going to ask a few questions, not to be nosy, but because the more we k now the more we can give you our best support and advice. I think the big guns should come before the therapist. Therapists tend to focus on parenting methods and if your boys are like most of our kids, therapist's discipline and parenting theories won't work and you will end up feeling blamed. And this is NOT YOUR FAULT!</p><p></p><p>This would apply to both boys.</p><p></p><p>1/How were they as infants? Did they like to cuddle or did they freeze up in your arms? Did they make good, steady eye contact with you? Did they have stable lives? Dad and Mom? They did not get moved around or experience many changes? What were their births like? Any problems? </p><p></p><p>2/Did they reach all their milestones on time, especially speech? Any motor skills issues? Any strange behaviors you can point to?</p><p></p><p>3/Moving on, can they transition well from one activity to another? Do they play appropriately with toys or do they take them apart or ignore them or throw them or line up cars, for example? Do they tend to copy what they hear on TV or what other people say? Any strange quirks or obsessive interests? Do they know how to get along with their same age peers without agitating them or ignoring them? Do they make strong eye contact with strangers?</p><p></p><p>4/Any sensitivities such as certain foods or clothing material? Are either overly sensitive to loud noise, even though THEY may make loud noise? Do they cover their ears? Do they ever rock or suck their shirts or seem like they are in their own worlds at certain times then at other times seem very alert and aware? Any tics?</p><p></p><p>5/Are there any psychiatric or neurological disorders on either side of their GENETIC family tree? Even if Dad has never been in their lives, he did deposit 50% of his DNA before he left so he is still there. So is his family tree and their issues. Lots of things are hereditary. is your husband the biological father?</p><p></p><p>Personally I'd hold off on the stimulants. They can make a lot of k ids worse and you aren't really sure your sons have ADHD or ODD or whatever until they are further evaluated. It will be hard for us to help you out until we know what is really going on with the kids. Pulling a knife is extreme even for ADHD/ODD and I suspect a wrong diagnosis there. An obsession with things like phones can point to autistic spectrum, although autistic spectrum kids don't normally pull knives (but some can if very frustrated). You need to get a strong handle of everything going on with your boys. There is the potential for a peaceful life for you and the boys, but you need to get more proactive. A pediatrician and then a talk therapist is not the way to go. You need a psychiatrist (the doctor with the MD) and you need the neuropsychologist with the PhD, the good testing methods, and extra knowledge that a pediatrician and therapist don't have. Some pediatricians don't even touch childhood disorders. I think it's better if they don't. They don't really understand them...sore throats are their specialty, not behavioral problems. </p><p></p><p>Others will come along.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 571641, member: 1550"] Hi there and welcome to the board :) My very first recommendation is to take them for a different and more thorough evaluation. Pediatricians tend to be very poor diagnosticians about childhood disorders. Filling out one short test, even with teachers involved, doesn't tell you much. Many of us oldsters feel ODD is a useless diagnosis and most of the time it is not used by higher level professionals such as neuropsychs and psychiatrists. It really doesn't mean more than the child is defiant. It does not tell you why. ODD rarely stands alone. There is usually a larger, bigger issue causing the ODD. I'm going to ask a few questions, not to be nosy, but because the more we k now the more we can give you our best support and advice. I think the big guns should come before the therapist. Therapists tend to focus on parenting methods and if your boys are like most of our kids, therapist's discipline and parenting theories won't work and you will end up feeling blamed. And this is NOT YOUR FAULT! This would apply to both boys. 1/How were they as infants? Did they like to cuddle or did they freeze up in your arms? Did they make good, steady eye contact with you? Did they have stable lives? Dad and Mom? They did not get moved around or experience many changes? What were their births like? Any problems? 2/Did they reach all their milestones on time, especially speech? Any motor skills issues? Any strange behaviors you can point to? 3/Moving on, can they transition well from one activity to another? Do they play appropriately with toys or do they take them apart or ignore them or throw them or line up cars, for example? Do they tend to copy what they hear on TV or what other people say? Any strange quirks or obsessive interests? Do they know how to get along with their same age peers without agitating them or ignoring them? Do they make strong eye contact with strangers? 4/Any sensitivities such as certain foods or clothing material? Are either overly sensitive to loud noise, even though THEY may make loud noise? Do they cover their ears? Do they ever rock or suck their shirts or seem like they are in their own worlds at certain times then at other times seem very alert and aware? Any tics? 5/Are there any psychiatric or neurological disorders on either side of their GENETIC family tree? Even if Dad has never been in their lives, he did deposit 50% of his DNA before he left so he is still there. So is his family tree and their issues. Lots of things are hereditary. is your husband the biological father? Personally I'd hold off on the stimulants. They can make a lot of k ids worse and you aren't really sure your sons have ADHD or ODD or whatever until they are further evaluated. It will be hard for us to help you out until we know what is really going on with the kids. Pulling a knife is extreme even for ADHD/ODD and I suspect a wrong diagnosis there. An obsession with things like phones can point to autistic spectrum, although autistic spectrum kids don't normally pull knives (but some can if very frustrated). You need to get a strong handle of everything going on with your boys. There is the potential for a peaceful life for you and the boys, but you need to get more proactive. A pediatrician and then a talk therapist is not the way to go. You need a psychiatrist (the doctor with the MD) and you need the neuropsychologist with the PhD, the good testing methods, and extra knowledge that a pediatrician and therapist don't have. Some pediatricians don't even touch childhood disorders. I think it's better if they don't. They don't really understand them...sore throats are their specialty, not behavioral problems. Others will come along. [/QUOTE]
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Newbie...Can I get some advice please? Dont know what to do!!
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