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<blockquote data-quote="Bluemoon" data-source="post: 380675"><p>Agreeing completely, Marg, and thank you.</p><p> </p><p>I pretty much have thrown out the homework (the need to do it) in the last 2 weeks. I made it clear to E's teachers that I am not going to have that fight anymore and if they can't deal with that then that's too bad. Of course, I didn't say it anywhere near as harshly as that, but I spelled out the issues it causes and the uselessness of even trying to force him to do it. They can either understand this, or not. At this moment in our journey, I don't care anymore what they think about my parenting abilities.</p><p>Prior to this, they didn't even have a clue...but they do seem to be gettting one now. Amazing what a doctors. confirmation can do. </p><p> </p><p>I will try your suggestion with the math, see how E responds. If it is favorably, I will discuss it with his teachers.</p><p>To be honest, I don't think my son really benefits from the homework. We would spend an entire evening with him swearing to me that he doesn't know how to do even the simplest parts of it...meltdowns and...well, it's a totally negative experience for all.</p><p>However, he almost always gets A's...often 100%... on tests. Unless he is aggravated over something and then he will fail it...purposely, I think.</p><p> </p><p>I remember his SE was so tickled one day because she <strong>finally</strong> managed to convince him to take a test. However, he failed it completely. I asked her, "Do you really think you got him to <em>take</em> that test? Really?" by the way: I love her and this was not said snidely...we were just discussing how difficult E can be.</p><p> </p><p>I am so sorry your son had to go through that horrible bullying experience. I have been very fortunate in this way. We live in a very small town and I am very involved in the schools and an authority figure to the children...pretty much all of whom I know very well...but they like me. Go figure, lol?</p><p>Therefore, I quickly get reports about anyone doing <em>anything</em> that it is thought I would not allow. Harming E is certainly high on that list.</p><p>The children know that E is "different" and have asked me why he acts the way he does. I told them that while he is very smart, his brain doesn't work the same way their's do. Whispering can sound like screaming to him, and screaming can make him close his ears completely. If a friend gets angry with him and says he doesn't like him anymore then E will believe he has lost that friend forever, even if it was only said in a moment of anger. It would hurt MUCH more than was intended.</p><p>He might cry like his heart is broken, cause it would be, or he might get very angry and act sorta crazy (they've seen this).</p><p>The children have been very tolerant and considerate of his issues ever since. <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite1" alt=":)" title="Smile :)" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":)" /></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Bluemoon, post: 380675"] Agreeing completely, Marg, and thank you. I pretty much have thrown out the homework (the need to do it) in the last 2 weeks. I made it clear to E's teachers that I am not going to have that fight anymore and if they can't deal with that then that's too bad. Of course, I didn't say it anywhere near as harshly as that, but I spelled out the issues it causes and the uselessness of even trying to force him to do it. They can either understand this, or not. At this moment in our journey, I don't care anymore what they think about my parenting abilities. Prior to this, they didn't even have a clue...but they do seem to be gettting one now. Amazing what a doctors. confirmation can do. I will try your suggestion with the math, see how E responds. If it is favorably, I will discuss it with his teachers. To be honest, I don't think my son really benefits from the homework. We would spend an entire evening with him swearing to me that he doesn't know how to do even the simplest parts of it...meltdowns and...well, it's a totally negative experience for all. However, he almost always gets A's...often 100%... on tests. Unless he is aggravated over something and then he will fail it...purposely, I think. I remember his SE was so tickled one day because she [B]finally[/B] managed to convince him to take a test. However, he failed it completely. I asked her, "Do you really think you got him to [I]take[/I] that test? Really?" by the way: I love her and this was not said snidely...we were just discussing how difficult E can be. I am so sorry your son had to go through that horrible bullying experience. I have been very fortunate in this way. We live in a very small town and I am very involved in the schools and an authority figure to the children...pretty much all of whom I know very well...but they like me. Go figure, lol? Therefore, I quickly get reports about anyone doing [I]anything[/I] that it is thought I would not allow. Harming E is certainly high on that list. The children know that E is "different" and have asked me why he acts the way he does. I told them that while he is very smart, his brain doesn't work the same way their's do. Whispering can sound like screaming to him, and screaming can make him close his ears completely. If a friend gets angry with him and says he doesn't like him anymore then E will believe he has lost that friend forever, even if it was only said in a moment of anger. It would hurt MUCH more than was intended. He might cry like his heart is broken, cause it would be, or he might get very angry and act sorta crazy (they've seen this). The children have been very tolerant and considerate of his issues ever since. :-) [/QUOTE]
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