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<blockquote data-quote="bzymomto4" data-source="post: 118797" data-attributes="member: 4477"><p>Hi, I can very much realate to your story with your daughter. She sounds just like mine all the way through 1st grade ( even now 2 yrs later if there is enough stress). I don't have any ideas that you can use that make things easy, but I wanted to share with you what we did, and I feel in the long run was beneficial to both of us. I can't remember a time I felt like my dughter needed to be punished because she wasn't following rules, but I can very clearly recall many momonts ( I don't think a day went by) when her behavior was out of control, for her and for myself. The worst was when it would happen in public and you more or less need a way to restrain her (for the saftey of herself, others and the stores merchandise). I can remeber having her strapped in a stroler around the age of 4, screeming fit, waiting in line just pay for shoes - being chastised by a women who thought I could fix it all if only I had been prepared enough to bring a banana with me. If only a banana could fix it all...... At home when she became distraught she always interferred with the rights of others and because of that I didn't feel it was appropriate to let her carry on per her will. Especially as she became older the one hard and fast thing was that when you are not feeling well enough or in control enough to be downstairs with everyone, then you must do all of your screeming and crying in your room. No easy task - she was in no way reasonable enough to stay put out of conciensious obiedience. I would generally have to carry her, prying her fingers off of the banister the whole way. The first 5 minutes in her room I would generally need to use full force to hold the door closed, after that she would find another part of her room to tantrum in, and it generally ended with sleep. I think an important part of handleing it this was that when she came out of her room she was quiet and looking for acceptence. I would ask her if she was feeling better, if she wanted a hug, and would offer to read her book. If there was a specific rule broken that needs to be talked about then that could be talked about a little later. Now at 9 she is very good, 90&#37; better at handleing the anxiety, but when it gets the best of she still behaves like that and we handle it the same way. not easy though.</p><p></p><p>As far as potty training there are probable 100 ways for 100 kids, but I had acouple ideas for what it's worth. Perhaps you could allow your son to put his big boy underware on over his pullup. Have a marble jar, button jar whatever kind of jar, and when he needs to go potty he needs to sit on the potty, even if that means peeing in the pull up. If you get a small enough jar or glass, you can tell him when it's full he can get a treat, then the next jar you fill up by wearing underware and a pullup, but this time you pee on the potty. Full jar = treat. For the 3rd jar (hopefully week 3) it's big boy underware only and again full jar = treat. I guess how long you need to bribe him with the jar would depend on your son. Hope this helps.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="bzymomto4, post: 118797, member: 4477"] Hi, I can very much realate to your story with your daughter. She sounds just like mine all the way through 1st grade ( even now 2 yrs later if there is enough stress). I don't have any ideas that you can use that make things easy, but I wanted to share with you what we did, and I feel in the long run was beneficial to both of us. I can't remember a time I felt like my dughter needed to be punished because she wasn't following rules, but I can very clearly recall many momonts ( I don't think a day went by) when her behavior was out of control, for her and for myself. The worst was when it would happen in public and you more or less need a way to restrain her (for the saftey of herself, others and the stores merchandise). I can remeber having her strapped in a stroler around the age of 4, screeming fit, waiting in line just pay for shoes - being chastised by a women who thought I could fix it all if only I had been prepared enough to bring a banana with me. If only a banana could fix it all...... At home when she became distraught she always interferred with the rights of others and because of that I didn't feel it was appropriate to let her carry on per her will. Especially as she became older the one hard and fast thing was that when you are not feeling well enough or in control enough to be downstairs with everyone, then you must do all of your screeming and crying in your room. No easy task - she was in no way reasonable enough to stay put out of conciensious obiedience. I would generally have to carry her, prying her fingers off of the banister the whole way. The first 5 minutes in her room I would generally need to use full force to hold the door closed, after that she would find another part of her room to tantrum in, and it generally ended with sleep. I think an important part of handleing it this was that when she came out of her room she was quiet and looking for acceptence. I would ask her if she was feeling better, if she wanted a hug, and would offer to read her book. If there was a specific rule broken that needs to be talked about then that could be talked about a little later. Now at 9 she is very good, 90% better at handleing the anxiety, but when it gets the best of she still behaves like that and we handle it the same way. not easy though. As far as potty training there are probable 100 ways for 100 kids, but I had acouple ideas for what it's worth. Perhaps you could allow your son to put his big boy underware on over his pullup. Have a marble jar, button jar whatever kind of jar, and when he needs to go potty he needs to sit on the potty, even if that means peeing in the pull up. If you get a small enough jar or glass, you can tell him when it's full he can get a treat, then the next jar you fill up by wearing underware and a pullup, but this time you pee on the potty. Full jar = treat. For the 3rd jar (hopefully week 3) it's big boy underware only and again full jar = treat. I guess how long you need to bribe him with the jar would depend on your son. Hope this helps. [/QUOTE]
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