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Newly diagnosed 17 yo with ADHD ODD Possible Depression
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<blockquote data-quote="Iamwipedouttoo" data-source="post: 300017" data-attributes="member: 7829"><p>Thank you all for your words of support. I really appreciate it. It has been a crazy few weeks and just knowing that I am not alone in all this is really helping.</p><p> </p><p>Thanks for the book reference. I've already read "Driven to Distraction" and "Teens with ADHD" and would love to read anything I can my hands on to try to make sense of all of this.</p><p> </p><p>To answer a few questions...</p><p> </p><p>What kind of doctor diagnosed her?</p><p> </p><p style="margin-left: 20px">Child/Adolescent Psychiatrist diagnosed her and is monitoring her medications. She (and us) are also seeing a talk therapist, a psychologist, who sees a lot of teens (different practice because of insurance) and she feels the ADHD diagnosis is correct.</p> <p style="margin-left: 20px"></p> <p style="margin-left: 20px"></p><p>Has she ever had neuropsychological testing? </p><p> </p><p style="margin-left: 20px">She may have had it as part of testing the school gives out but if this has been done, I am not aware of her results.</p> <p style="margin-left: 20px"></p><p>Is she taking any medications, and if so, what and how has she reacted to them?</p><p> </p><p style="margin-left: 20px">Vyvanse 30mg, seems to take the edge off. In my opinion she seems more able to slow down before she reacts to situations. My husband doesn't think it does anything. I have seen an honest improvement, though, it's not a complete turnaround.</p> <p style="margin-left: 20px"></p> <p style="margin-left: 20px">To give you an idea - She missed a dose one day last week and I noticed that she was really agrumentative (all the while she was trying to do her homeowork and noone was asking her for anything, mind you - she tried to start 8 fights in one hour! No kidding.). It was so bad that my 14 year old came to me in private and asked what exactly her medicine was supposed to do and after I explained it he exclaimed, "Well, it's OBVIOUSLY not working." He didn't know she missed her dose that day! That was enough proof to me that the medications are helping.</p> <p style="margin-left: 20px"></p> <p style="margin-left: 20px">She seems moodier in the evenings than when she first gets home from school though she's better than she's ever been.</p> <p style="margin-left: 20px"></p><p>How does she do in school, both academically and with peers? </p><p style="margin-left: 20px">Academically, she was always a challenge but I've always been told she is really smart - all she needs to do is apply herself. She had difficulty reading in K, 1st grade but we got her help over the summer before 2nd and she was back on track by beginning of 2nd. Homework has always been a problem. Younger years she's miss entire sections of worksheets. Older elementary, middle I noticed she had a hard time organizing to even know what she had to do. The teacher had to sign her assignment books and I had to sign them at home (it was always a fight, too!). I would hear regularly from teachers about her excess chattiness. High school, she goes through spurts of doing okay (C-level) but often fails tests, especially in classes she has a problem with the teacher (I hear every excuse in the book - I was in the high school 3x last year because she felt she was being mistreated or because she claimed the teacher wasn't teaching.) According to her teachers she could <u>easily</u> make As and Bs if she just applied herself.</p> <p style="margin-left: 20px"></p> <p style="margin-left: 20px">Girls always seem to move on or keep it casual with her (she does not have a best friend, the one time in her life she did she forgot all about her when she an another girl started to spend time together. The new best friend ditched her for another friend and she's not had a best girl friend since though she spends some time with girls she's met at school.</p> <p style="margin-left: 20px"></p> <p style="margin-left: 20px">She says she prefers guy friends because they aren't so catty and that most girls are You-know-whats. She's had the same boyfriend for 9 months now though they have been going on again off again over the summer (I found out he has adhd after she was diagnosed).</p> <p style="margin-left: 20px"></p><p>What behaviors are you seeing that most concern you?</p><ul> <li data-xf-list-type="ul"><ol> <li data-xf-list-type="ol">Her failure to do what she says she'll do even when she is told and agrees beforehand</li> <li data-xf-list-type="ol">Rewards, no matter how big or small, do not work with her - we told her we'd buy a car for her if she handed in all homework and kept Cs or better in all her classes the 1st semester of school last year. You can guess how that went. When she didn't get the car, she blamed her teachers for her not handing in work and not getting the grades she was expected to and us for being unreasonable.</li> <li data-xf-list-type="ol">Her anger over what she perceives as unfair treatment (related to peers and siblings). Teachers are always the problem for her grades. We are unreasonable in our expectations (which are be respectful of others, do your chores, try in school, be in by curfew, and clean up after yourself in the common areas of the house).</li> <li data-xf-list-type="ol">Her forgetfullness and lack of organization, then her anger at me or my husband when we don't remind her of things that should be her responsibility - getting up for school, doing her homework, etc.</li> <li data-xf-list-type="ol">My fear to drive with her because she gets so mad at me when I have to intervene that I am scared to drive with her. My husband won't drive with her anymore for the same reason. (we almost got into three accidents over the past year - she's had her permit THAT long!)</li> </ol></li> </ul> <p style="margin-left: 20px">That is what is going on right now, anyway.</p> <p style="margin-left: 20px"></p> <p style="margin-left: 20px"></p><p>I hope that answers your questions. I'm sure I left things out.</p><p> </p><p>I am seriously considering going to talk to someone about this whole situation with my daughter and my husband's refusal to give into the adhd diagnosis. It is really causing a lot of extra stress. We had to come up with a plan for her to get to use of her cell phone and he was resistant to making any changes to the way we handled rewards/consequences saying we've done it all before and that writing it down was stupid and unecessary. I was so upset because our daughter seemed to feel it was necessary and I saw that requirement as part of the adhd - it doesn't matter if the other two kids don't need it written down - SHE does. I am also upset because he isn't getting that we need to focus more on short term rewards with her. He's wants it all or nothing. So yeah, I think I need to find someone for me because he's driving me mad. lol</p><p> </p><p>Thanks again to all of you. (((hugs))))</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Iamwipedouttoo, post: 300017, member: 7829"] Thank you all for your words of support. I really appreciate it. It has been a crazy few weeks and just knowing that I am not alone in all this is really helping. Thanks for the book reference. I've already read "Driven to Distraction" and "Teens with ADHD" and would love to read anything I can my hands on to try to make sense of all of this. To answer a few questions... What kind of doctor diagnosed her? [INDENT]Child/Adolescent Psychiatrist diagnosed her and is monitoring her medications. She (and us) are also seeing a talk therapist, a psychologist, who sees a lot of teens (different practice because of insurance) and she feels the ADHD diagnosis is correct. [/INDENT]Has she ever had neuropsychological testing? [INDENT]She may have had it as part of testing the school gives out but if this has been done, I am not aware of her results. [/INDENT]Is she taking any medications, and if so, what and how has she reacted to them? [INDENT]Vyvanse 30mg, seems to take the edge off. In my opinion she seems more able to slow down before she reacts to situations. My husband doesn't think it does anything. I have seen an honest improvement, though, it's not a complete turnaround. To give you an idea - She missed a dose one day last week and I noticed that she was really agrumentative (all the while she was trying to do her homeowork and noone was asking her for anything, mind you - she tried to start 8 fights in one hour! No kidding.). It was so bad that my 14 year old came to me in private and asked what exactly her medicine was supposed to do and after I explained it he exclaimed, "Well, it's OBVIOUSLY not working." He didn't know she missed her dose that day! That was enough proof to me that the medications are helping. She seems moodier in the evenings than when she first gets home from school though she's better than she's ever been. [/INDENT] How does she do in school, both academically and with peers? [INDENT]Academically, she was always a challenge but I've always been told she is really smart - all she needs to do is apply herself. She had difficulty reading in K, 1st grade but we got her help over the summer before 2nd and she was back on track by beginning of 2nd. Homework has always been a problem. Younger years she's miss entire sections of worksheets. Older elementary, middle I noticed she had a hard time organizing to even know what she had to do. The teacher had to sign her assignment books and I had to sign them at home (it was always a fight, too!). I would hear regularly from teachers about her excess chattiness. High school, she goes through spurts of doing okay (C-level) but often fails tests, especially in classes she has a problem with the teacher (I hear every excuse in the book - I was in the high school 3x last year because she felt she was being mistreated or because she claimed the teacher wasn't teaching.) According to her teachers she could [U]easily[/U] make As and Bs if she just applied herself. Girls always seem to move on or keep it casual with her (she does not have a best friend, the one time in her life she did she forgot all about her when she an another girl started to spend time together. The new best friend ditched her for another friend and she's not had a best girl friend since though she spends some time with girls she's met at school. She says she prefers guy friends because they aren't so catty and that most girls are You-know-whats. She's had the same boyfriend for 9 months now though they have been going on again off again over the summer (I found out he has adhd after she was diagnosed). [/INDENT] What behaviors are you seeing that most concern you? [LIST][LIST=1] [*]Her failure to do what she says she'll do even when she is told and agrees beforehand [*]Rewards, no matter how big or small, do not work with her - we told her we'd buy a car for her if she handed in all homework and kept Cs or better in all her classes the 1st semester of school last year. You can guess how that went. When she didn't get the car, she blamed her teachers for her not handing in work and not getting the grades she was expected to and us for being unreasonable. [*]Her anger over what she perceives as unfair treatment (related to peers and siblings). Teachers are always the problem for her grades. We are unreasonable in our expectations (which are be respectful of others, do your chores, try in school, be in by curfew, and clean up after yourself in the common areas of the house). [*]Her forgetfullness and lack of organization, then her anger at me or my husband when we don't remind her of things that should be her responsibility - getting up for school, doing her homework, etc. [*]My fear to drive with her because she gets so mad at me when I have to intervene that I am scared to drive with her. My husband won't drive with her anymore for the same reason. (we almost got into three accidents over the past year - she's had her permit THAT long!) [/LIST] [/LIST][INDENT]That is what is going on right now, anyway. [/INDENT]I hope that answers your questions. I'm sure I left things out. I am seriously considering going to talk to someone about this whole situation with my daughter and my husband's refusal to give into the adhd diagnosis. It is really causing a lot of extra stress. We had to come up with a plan for her to get to use of her cell phone and he was resistant to making any changes to the way we handled rewards/consequences saying we've done it all before and that writing it down was stupid and unecessary. I was so upset because our daughter seemed to feel it was necessary and I saw that requirement as part of the adhd - it doesn't matter if the other two kids don't need it written down - SHE does. I am also upset because he isn't getting that we need to focus more on short term rewards with her. He's wants it all or nothing. So yeah, I think I need to find someone for me because he's driving me mad. lol Thanks again to all of you. (((hugs)))) [/QUOTE]
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