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Parent Emeritus
Not helping to help our difficult children
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<blockquote data-quote="Nomad" data-source="post: 175555"><p>Witz...</p><p>I really don't know the answer, but I think we know from these boards and other sources that it is possible to give too much help to an <em>adult</em> child (and must stop in order to save them). I also think other factors have to be taken into consideration like illness. Sometimes there are no black and white answers. Each individual is different and each family has to make a determination as to what is appropriate. Hopefully, families going through great difficulties will seek wise counsel. We all know there are good support groups and even books available. And professional guidance is often a good move as well.</p><p> </p><p>Judi...</p><p>I know for me "detaching" meant letting go in a certain kind of way. I think these issues are so sensitive, and parents of difficult children have been through so much, it is wise to be gentle. Great point about things being taken out of context in the heat of the moment! </p><p> </p><p>I see what you mean totally when you say that detaching doesn't mean we still don't love our children. I suppose this is just one more area that can lead to misunderstandings...esp. with folks who have not been in our shoes.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Nomad, post: 175555"] Witz... I really don't know the answer, but I think we know from these boards and other sources that it is possible to give too much help to an [I]adult[/I] child (and must stop in order to save them). I also think other factors have to be taken into consideration like illness. Sometimes there are no black and white answers. Each individual is different and each family has to make a determination as to what is appropriate. Hopefully, families going through great difficulties will seek wise counsel. We all know there are good support groups and even books available. And professional guidance is often a good move as well. Judi... I know for me "detaching" meant letting go in a certain kind of way. I think these issues are so sensitive, and parents of difficult children have been through so much, it is wise to be gentle. Great point about things being taken out of context in the heat of the moment! I see what you mean totally when you say that detaching doesn't mean we still don't love our children. I suppose this is just one more area that can lead to misunderstandings...esp. with folks who have not been in our shoes. [/QUOTE]
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Not helping to help our difficult children
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