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General Parenting
Not really sure what to do...I guess I'm looking for support, ideas, and commiseratio
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<blockquote data-quote="agee" data-source="post: 295632"><p>I think the advice to take a step back and watch is good advice. I will *try* to do this. The main problem with the things my son does is that a)they are breaking a household rule that is there for a very good reason, like safety (i.e. don't leave our 2-acre fenced in yard without telling us where you're going), respect for others (i.e. don't walk up to your brother who is playing legos, shove him, and start smashing the legos, and calling him a swear word), or respect for property (the aforementioned gouging the hole in the floor, or even stuff like emptying all the shampoo out of the bottles in the shower when told over and over again not to do it. And yes, we put the shampoo bottles up high. He brings a couple of stools in the shower, piles them up, and gets the shampoo anyway). So not having a consequence for these actions seems very counterintuitive. And the consequence generally involves a talking-to and a time-out, not a beating, which I may have led some of you to believe what's going on. A spanking is last resort, and usually is because of breaking a rule over and over and over again. </p><p></p><p>My son had a language delay, but I'm pretty sure it's because he was spoken to in one language and at 15 mos couldn't speak himself (this is very common in an orphanage) and then came into a house where we spoke another language. But he learned baby sign within hours of us getting him, and his language delay was one of articulation. He talked, we just couldn't understand what he was saying. He talks a ton now, and is pretty good at self-reporting, be it how he's feeling or how stupid and mean we are.</p><p></p><p>Honestly, I think a big problem for us right now is inappropriate medications. We are able to handle the mornings well, but by the evening (when my exhausted husband comes home) things go south, fast. And this is when he's burnt through all his medications and he is tired, too.</p><p></p><p>So - thanks for all the amazing advice. We have a doctors. appointment. today and we'll have some medications. adjustments and I'll ask for a neuropsychologist referral and we'll take it from there.</p><p>A</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="agee, post: 295632"] I think the advice to take a step back and watch is good advice. I will *try* to do this. The main problem with the things my son does is that a)they are breaking a household rule that is there for a very good reason, like safety (i.e. don't leave our 2-acre fenced in yard without telling us where you're going), respect for others (i.e. don't walk up to your brother who is playing legos, shove him, and start smashing the legos, and calling him a swear word), or respect for property (the aforementioned gouging the hole in the floor, or even stuff like emptying all the shampoo out of the bottles in the shower when told over and over again not to do it. And yes, we put the shampoo bottles up high. He brings a couple of stools in the shower, piles them up, and gets the shampoo anyway). So not having a consequence for these actions seems very counterintuitive. And the consequence generally involves a talking-to and a time-out, not a beating, which I may have led some of you to believe what's going on. A spanking is last resort, and usually is because of breaking a rule over and over and over again. My son had a language delay, but I'm pretty sure it's because he was spoken to in one language and at 15 mos couldn't speak himself (this is very common in an orphanage) and then came into a house where we spoke another language. But he learned baby sign within hours of us getting him, and his language delay was one of articulation. He talked, we just couldn't understand what he was saying. He talks a ton now, and is pretty good at self-reporting, be it how he's feeling or how stupid and mean we are. Honestly, I think a big problem for us right now is inappropriate medications. We are able to handle the mornings well, but by the evening (when my exhausted husband comes home) things go south, fast. And this is when he's burnt through all his medications and he is tired, too. So - thanks for all the amazing advice. We have a doctors. appointment. today and we'll have some medications. adjustments and I'll ask for a neuropsychologist referral and we'll take it from there. A [/QUOTE]
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Not really sure what to do...I guess I'm looking for support, ideas, and commiseratio
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