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<blockquote data-quote="Frazzledmom" data-source="post: 399508"><p>Hi, I've posted recently on the general list about my son who is 15 and in his second year of high school. He's always been quite difficult child-like but doesn't have an official diagnosis other than anxiety via a neuropsychologist exam when he was in the third or fourth grade. We've done ok managing him until about three months ago when he plummeted. He went from an A/B student to failing. He refuses to comply with any rules (and there are very few - probably our worst mistake). He's run away twice since the summer, and threatened several other time. It all points to drug use and in fact he has "admitted" it to us that he's used pot and alcohol. </p><p> </p><p>Knowing him it could be a few times or a lot but we've seen no definite evidence and he hasn't been caught although he has had opportunity. My question is, what is the next step? We've done a cursory search of his room and found nothing. This must sound so naive to you folks but what are the exact steps if we find something. I don't think he's addicted but we obviously don't support drug use. Our plan currently is to hold his driving license hostage - he's allowed in this state to send for his license in April. We can take away things like cell phone and computer use but I'm not convinced that would stop drug use. Would we go so far as to drug test him? If so, how do you get him tested? He would not do so willingly. He's due to get his wisdom teeth out soon, can we ask that he be drug tested then? What do you do if they turn out positive? Again, this is all new to us so we're lost. I read over and over again that you say they won't change unless they want to. I'd appreciate any thoughts.... </p><p> </p><p>-Lynn</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Frazzledmom, post: 399508"] Hi, I've posted recently on the general list about my son who is 15 and in his second year of high school. He's always been quite difficult child-like but doesn't have an official diagnosis other than anxiety via a neuropsychologist exam when he was in the third or fourth grade. We've done ok managing him until about three months ago when he plummeted. He went from an A/B student to failing. He refuses to comply with any rules (and there are very few - probably our worst mistake). He's run away twice since the summer, and threatened several other time. It all points to drug use and in fact he has "admitted" it to us that he's used pot and alcohol. Knowing him it could be a few times or a lot but we've seen no definite evidence and he hasn't been caught although he has had opportunity. My question is, what is the next step? We've done a cursory search of his room and found nothing. This must sound so naive to you folks but what are the exact steps if we find something. I don't think he's addicted but we obviously don't support drug use. Our plan currently is to hold his driving license hostage - he's allowed in this state to send for his license in April. We can take away things like cell phone and computer use but I'm not convinced that would stop drug use. Would we go so far as to drug test him? If so, how do you get him tested? He would not do so willingly. He's due to get his wisdom teeth out soon, can we ask that he be drug tested then? What do you do if they turn out positive? Again, this is all new to us so we're lost. I read over and over again that you say they won't change unless they want to. I'd appreciate any thoughts.... -Lynn [/QUOTE]
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