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The Watercooler
Now THAT'S a bad work day!
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<blockquote data-quote="nvts" data-source="post: 194045" data-attributes="member: 3814"><p>My bff sent this to me. After the week I've had (I'll post when I have the energy - lets just say that ACS is back - AGAIN!!!) with difficult child 1. When I read this, I realized that worse things could happen!</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Rob is a commercial saturation diver for Global Divers in</p><p>Louisiana. He performs underwater repairs on offshore drilling rigs.</p><p> </p><p> Below is an E-mail he sent to his sister. She then sent it to a radio station 103.2 on FM dial in Ft. Wayne, Indiana, who was sponsoring a worst job experience contest. Needless to say, she won.</p><p> </p><p></p><p>> Hi Sue,</p><p>> </p><p>> Just another note from your bottom-dwelling brother. Last</p><p>> week I had a bad </p><p>> day at the office. I know you've been feeling down</p><p>> lately at work, so I </p><p>> thought I would share my dilemma with you to make realize</p><p>> it's not so bad after </p><p>> all. Before I can tell you what happened to me, I first</p><p>> must bore you with a </p><p>> few technicalities of my job.</p><p>> </p><p>> As you know, my office lies at the bottom of the sea. I</p><p>> wear a suit to the </p><p>> office. It's a wet suit. This time of year the water</p><p>> is quite cool. So what we </p><p>> do to keep warm is this: We have a diesel powered</p><p>> industrial water heater. </p><p>> This $20,000 piece of equipment ***** the water out of the</p><p>> sea. It heats it </p><p>> to a delightful temperature.</p><p>> </p><p>> It then pumps it down to the diver through a garden hose,</p><p>> which is taped to </p><p>> the air hose. Now this sounds like a darn good plan, and</p><p>> I've used it several </p><p>> times with no complaints.</p><p>> </p><p>> What I do, when I get to the bottom and start working, is </p><p>> take the hose and </p><p>> stuff it down the back of my wet suit. This floods my</p><p>> whole suit with warm </p><p>> water. It's like working in a Jacuzzi.</p><p>> </p><p>> Everything was going well until all of a sudden, my butt </p><p>> started to itch. </p><p>> So, of course, I scratched it. This only made things</p><p>> worse. Within a few </p><p>> seconds my butt started to burn. I pulled the hose out</p><p>> from my back, but the damage </p><p>> was done. In agony I realized what had happened. The hot</p><p>> water machine had </p><p>> sucked up a jellyfish and pumped it into my suit. Now,</p><p>> since I don't have any </p><p>> hair on my back, the jellyfish couldn't stick to it.</p><p>> However, the crack of </p><p>> my butt was not as fortunate. When I scratched what I</p><p>> thought was an itch, I </p><p>> was actually grinding the jellyfish into the crack of my</p><p>> butt.</p><p>> </p><p>> I informed the dive supervisor of my dilemma over the </p><p>> communicator. His </p><p>> instructions were unclear due to the fact that he, along</p><p>> with five other divers, </p><p>> were all laughing hysterically.</p><p>> </p><p>> Needless to say I aborted the dive. I was instructed to</p><p>> make three agonizing </p><p>> in-water decompression stops totaling thirty-five minutes</p><p>> before I could </p><p>> reach the surface to begin my chamber dry decompression.</p><p>> </p><p>> When I arrived at the surface, I was wearing nothing but</p><p>> my brass helmet. As </p><p>> I climbed out of the water, the medic, with tears of</p><p>> laughter running down </p><p>> his face, handed me a tube of cream and told me to rub it</p><p>> on my butt as soon </p><p>> as I got in the chamber. The cream put the fire out, but I</p><p>> couldn't poop for </p><p>> two days because my butt was swollen shut.</p><p>> </p><p>> So, next time you're having a bad day at work, think</p><p>> about how much worse </p><p>> it would be if you had a jellyfish shoved up your butt. </p><p>> </p><p>> Now repeat to yourself, 'I love my job, I love my job,</p><p>> I love my job.'</p><p>> </p><p>> Now whenever you have a bad day, ask yourself, is this a</p><p>> jellyfish bad day?</p><p>> </p><p>> May you NEVER have a jellyfish bad day!!!!! </p><p>> </p><p></p><p> </p><p>My truest feeling is that none of you are having a jellyfish bad day!</p><p> </p><p>Beth</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="nvts, post: 194045, member: 3814"] My bff sent this to me. After the week I've had (I'll post when I have the energy - lets just say that ACS is back - AGAIN!!!) with difficult child 1. When I read this, I realized that worse things could happen! Rob is a commercial saturation diver for Global Divers in Louisiana. He performs underwater repairs on offshore drilling rigs. Below is an E-mail he sent to his sister. She then sent it to a radio station 103.2 on FM dial in Ft. Wayne, Indiana, who was sponsoring a worst job experience contest. Needless to say, she won. > Hi Sue, > > Just another note from your bottom-dwelling brother. Last > week I had a bad > day at the office. I know you've been feeling down > lately at work, so I > thought I would share my dilemma with you to make realize > it's not so bad after > all. Before I can tell you what happened to me, I first > must bore you with a > few technicalities of my job. > > As you know, my office lies at the bottom of the sea. I > wear a suit to the > office. It's a wet suit. This time of year the water > is quite cool. So what we > do to keep warm is this: We have a diesel powered > industrial water heater. > This $20,000 piece of equipment ***** the water out of the > sea. It heats it > to a delightful temperature. > > It then pumps it down to the diver through a garden hose, > which is taped to > the air hose. Now this sounds like a darn good plan, and > I've used it several > times with no complaints. > > What I do, when I get to the bottom and start working, is > take the hose and > stuff it down the back of my wet suit. This floods my > whole suit with warm > water. It's like working in a Jacuzzi. > > Everything was going well until all of a sudden, my butt > started to itch. > So, of course, I scratched it. This only made things > worse. Within a few > seconds my butt started to burn. I pulled the hose out > from my back, but the damage > was done. In agony I realized what had happened. The hot > water machine had > sucked up a jellyfish and pumped it into my suit. Now, > since I don't have any > hair on my back, the jellyfish couldn't stick to it. > However, the crack of > my butt was not as fortunate. When I scratched what I > thought was an itch, I > was actually grinding the jellyfish into the crack of my > butt. > > I informed the dive supervisor of my dilemma over the > communicator. His > instructions were unclear due to the fact that he, along > with five other divers, > were all laughing hysterically. > > Needless to say I aborted the dive. I was instructed to > make three agonizing > in-water decompression stops totaling thirty-five minutes > before I could > reach the surface to begin my chamber dry decompression. > > When I arrived at the surface, I was wearing nothing but > my brass helmet. As > I climbed out of the water, the medic, with tears of > laughter running down > his face, handed me a tube of cream and told me to rub it > on my butt as soon > as I got in the chamber. The cream put the fire out, but I > couldn't poop for > two days because my butt was swollen shut. > > So, next time you're having a bad day at work, think > about how much worse > it would be if you had a jellyfish shoved up your butt. > > Now repeat to yourself, 'I love my job, I love my job, > I love my job.' > > Now whenever you have a bad day, ask yourself, is this a > jellyfish bad day? > > May you NEVER have a jellyfish bad day!!!!! > My truest feeling is that none of you are having a jellyfish bad day! Beth [/QUOTE]
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