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Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) in 4year old, we are desperate please help
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<blockquote data-quote="Marguerite" data-source="post: 153248" data-attributes="member: 1991"><p>Don't blame yourself about the occasional word that seems to trigger an obsession - anything could trigger it, you can't mentally analyse everything you're going to say, before you say it!</p><p></p><p>I did find, however, I was self-censoring a lot of what I said to difficult child 3, to avid confusion. You know how you have to avoid sarcasm, or anything ambiguous? I would say, "that is correct," instead of "that is right," to avoid confusion with "left" and "right".</p><p></p><p>It does sound to me like he has a lot of issues that could all connect to Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD). You could get a separate diagnosis for each one (Sensory Integration Disorder (SID), Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD), ADHD, Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD)) but Down Under you're more likely to get a doctor telling you it all comes under one umbrella. Doesn't mean you're not dealing with it, it's just another aspect of it though. But whichever way it goes - doesn't change what you deal with.</p><p></p><p>The broken arm could well have increased his anxiety. And I remember difficult child 3 having problems along these lines - he was about 3 and being tested for hearing (we'd been dobbed in to DOCS). He was desperate to go to the toilet but as I opened the door, a woman turned on the hand dryer. difficult child 3 panicked and refused to go in, he was screaming in terror. I tried again after the hand dryer was off and the woman had gone, but he wouldn't go in. And he was getting increasingly desperate, plus we were an hour's drive from home.</p><p></p><p>After that, he would refuse to use public toilets for years. At school, he would wait until he came home or soil himself.</p><p></p><p>Then we were able to persuade him to come with us into a disabled toilet, but we weren't permitted to touch the hand dryer. If possible, he wanted us to switch it off at the wall.</p><p></p><p>These days - no problem. But it took time, patience, acceptance (by us) and accommodation. He needed us to respect his fear, at least enough to not force the issue.</p><p></p><p>We had similar fears with difficult child 1 - animals, and water. He went years without having his hair washed. And bowel training was a shocker - it was as if he decided that excretion was now a thing of the past, he need never have to do it again if he had enough willpower.</p><p>And I do think that comes into it at least a bit - I shared a few weeks ago, how when difficult child 3 was about four or five (not sure exactly) I hard him head into the toilet first thing in the morning to empty his bladder, and he exclaimed loudly, "every morning, there's wee!" as if he expected he should have grown out of it by now.</p><p></p><p>easy child 2/difficult child 2 as a baby had trouble going to sleep - it was as if she had decided she never needed to sleep, ever again. She sat in her cot, swaying with exhaustion, eyes closing, still screaming in anger at being put to bed... then she would fall over, hit the pillow and wake up again and start screaming all over again. Every time, day after day.</p><p></p><p>They are all different. Even in the same family - each Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD) kid is different. Different personalities, different problems, different talents. The one thing I've noticed is they all did better when I kept them occupied.</p><p></p><p>Task-changing is a big point of conflict - there are ways to make it a lot easier. Read "The Explosive Child" for some really good ideas.</p><p></p><p>ANd the other really important thing - keep a diary. All the stuff you've written, needs to be kept on file for you to refer to and maybe show any doctors and therapists. I also made a Communication Book to travel in difficult child 3's schoolbag, and I would type my entries on the computer, print them out and stick them in. His teachers could then read them for a heads up or anything else. "He slept badly last night, he could be tired in class today. He's coming down with a cold and his behaviour always gets worse when he's getting sick."</p><p>The teacher could then write anything she felt I needed to know. "He worked well this morning but had trouble settling after lunch."</p><p></p><p>I found it also helped us get a better understanding of any link such as illness, certain events, food etc. We identified a couple of allergies we didn't know about, by seeing the clues in the Communication Book entries. And I would take the book with me to show the pediatrician. Educators would look at the book when we were doing the IEP.</p><p>And it saved me from having to try to remember it all.</p><p></p><p>You mentioned your husband looking at the posts - that is really good. husband & I do this, it has helped our communication even more. We thought we were good communicators before this - now we're even better!</p><p></p><p>Marg</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Marguerite, post: 153248, member: 1991"] Don't blame yourself about the occasional word that seems to trigger an obsession - anything could trigger it, you can't mentally analyse everything you're going to say, before you say it! I did find, however, I was self-censoring a lot of what I said to difficult child 3, to avid confusion. You know how you have to avoid sarcasm, or anything ambiguous? I would say, "that is correct," instead of "that is right," to avoid confusion with "left" and "right". It does sound to me like he has a lot of issues that could all connect to Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD). You could get a separate diagnosis for each one (Sensory Integration Disorder (SID), Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD), ADHD, Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD)) but Down Under you're more likely to get a doctor telling you it all comes under one umbrella. Doesn't mean you're not dealing with it, it's just another aspect of it though. But whichever way it goes - doesn't change what you deal with. The broken arm could well have increased his anxiety. And I remember difficult child 3 having problems along these lines - he was about 3 and being tested for hearing (we'd been dobbed in to DOCS). He was desperate to go to the toilet but as I opened the door, a woman turned on the hand dryer. difficult child 3 panicked and refused to go in, he was screaming in terror. I tried again after the hand dryer was off and the woman had gone, but he wouldn't go in. And he was getting increasingly desperate, plus we were an hour's drive from home. After that, he would refuse to use public toilets for years. At school, he would wait until he came home or soil himself. Then we were able to persuade him to come with us into a disabled toilet, but we weren't permitted to touch the hand dryer. If possible, he wanted us to switch it off at the wall. These days - no problem. But it took time, patience, acceptance (by us) and accommodation. He needed us to respect his fear, at least enough to not force the issue. We had similar fears with difficult child 1 - animals, and water. He went years without having his hair washed. And bowel training was a shocker - it was as if he decided that excretion was now a thing of the past, he need never have to do it again if he had enough willpower. And I do think that comes into it at least a bit - I shared a few weeks ago, how when difficult child 3 was about four or five (not sure exactly) I hard him head into the toilet first thing in the morning to empty his bladder, and he exclaimed loudly, "every morning, there's wee!" as if he expected he should have grown out of it by now. easy child 2/difficult child 2 as a baby had trouble going to sleep - it was as if she had decided she never needed to sleep, ever again. She sat in her cot, swaying with exhaustion, eyes closing, still screaming in anger at being put to bed... then she would fall over, hit the pillow and wake up again and start screaming all over again. Every time, day after day. They are all different. Even in the same family - each Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD) kid is different. Different personalities, different problems, different talents. The one thing I've noticed is they all did better when I kept them occupied. Task-changing is a big point of conflict - there are ways to make it a lot easier. Read "The Explosive Child" for some really good ideas. ANd the other really important thing - keep a diary. All the stuff you've written, needs to be kept on file for you to refer to and maybe show any doctors and therapists. I also made a Communication Book to travel in difficult child 3's schoolbag, and I would type my entries on the computer, print them out and stick them in. His teachers could then read them for a heads up or anything else. "He slept badly last night, he could be tired in class today. He's coming down with a cold and his behaviour always gets worse when he's getting sick." The teacher could then write anything she felt I needed to know. "He worked well this morning but had trouble settling after lunch." I found it also helped us get a better understanding of any link such as illness, certain events, food etc. We identified a couple of allergies we didn't know about, by seeing the clues in the Communication Book entries. And I would take the book with me to show the pediatrician. Educators would look at the book when we were doing the IEP. And it saved me from having to try to remember it all. You mentioned your husband looking at the posts - that is really good. husband & I do this, it has helped our communication even more. We thought we were good communicators before this - now we're even better! Marg [/QUOTE]
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