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General Parenting
Out of control 15yo son breaking my heart and the law
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<blockquote data-quote="RN0441" data-source="post: 719868" data-attributes="member: 15032"><p>Cor</p><p></p><p>Welcome. You have gotten good advice. You are ME six years ago. </p><p></p><p>My beautiful son started with weed at 15. Got kicked out of school in sophomore year for having it in the boys bathroom (too harsh but I was like a train wreck so couldn't even fight it). He was in legal trouble for taking stuff out of unlocked cars. His juvenile officer told me to have him tested for Special Education to get him back into the school system. He tested too high for an IEP (actually above average IQ - oh great) but I was able to get him back in with a 504 Plan for anxiety. He went to an alternative school and the kids there were worse than him but most followed the rules better than he did. Who was this kid???? </p><p></p><p>I took him to a psychiatrist that put him on a benzo for his anxiety. I trusted the doctor. He was very loved in the community. Had many admirers. BIG MISTAKE. He got addicted and we have been fighting this since that time. I hope and pray that you do not go through what we have been through. We have watched our son self-destruct for many YEARS. He barely graduated high school. We have been robbed of every joy since that time of having a child.</p><p></p><p>I have been in therapy on and off for years which has helped me create healthy boundaries which are necessary for ME and also good for HIM. I blamed myself for a long time (isn't it the parenting when a kid goes off the rails???) but I finally realized that he had a great life and loving family and it was just the way HE was wired. I had to accept that there was only so much we could do. It has been hell. Our marriage was suffering and my whole life was falling apart. Looking back I have no idea how we survived it.</p><p></p><p>I am still waiting for our happy ending. He has been in multiple rehabs but always goes back to using after a few months. We even sent him out of state last year. In a few weeks he is going to a Christian based long term program. He doesn't want to go but we told him he has to trust us that this will help him. He is at least willing to go and that is a start. This is our final attempt at directing him to a better life.</p><p></p><p>Keep reading and posting. There is so much wisdom here and we all get it.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="RN0441, post: 719868, member: 15032"] Cor Welcome. You have gotten good advice. You are ME six years ago. My beautiful son started with weed at 15. Got kicked out of school in sophomore year for having it in the boys bathroom (too harsh but I was like a train wreck so couldn't even fight it). He was in legal trouble for taking stuff out of unlocked cars. His juvenile officer told me to have him tested for Special Education to get him back into the school system. He tested too high for an IEP (actually above average IQ - oh great) but I was able to get him back in with a 504 Plan for anxiety. He went to an alternative school and the kids there were worse than him but most followed the rules better than he did. Who was this kid???? I took him to a psychiatrist that put him on a benzo for his anxiety. I trusted the doctor. He was very loved in the community. Had many admirers. BIG MISTAKE. He got addicted and we have been fighting this since that time. I hope and pray that you do not go through what we have been through. We have watched our son self-destruct for many YEARS. He barely graduated high school. We have been robbed of every joy since that time of having a child. I have been in therapy on and off for years which has helped me create healthy boundaries which are necessary for ME and also good for HIM. I blamed myself for a long time (isn't it the parenting when a kid goes off the rails???) but I finally realized that he had a great life and loving family and it was just the way HE was wired. I had to accept that there was only so much we could do. It has been hell. Our marriage was suffering and my whole life was falling apart. Looking back I have no idea how we survived it. I am still waiting for our happy ending. He has been in multiple rehabs but always goes back to using after a few months. We even sent him out of state last year. In a few weeks he is going to a Christian based long term program. He doesn't want to go but we told him he has to trust us that this will help him. He is at least willing to go and that is a start. This is our final attempt at directing him to a better life. Keep reading and posting. There is so much wisdom here and we all get it. [/QUOTE]
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Out of control 15yo son breaking my heart and the law
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